School Star

School Star is the twenty-eighth episode of Livin' With The Squid.

Characters

 * Patrick Star
 * Matthew Krabs
 * Mrs. BossyBlob (debut)
 * Taylor (cameo)
 * Tyler (debut; cameo)
 * Travaluc (debut; cameo)
 * Principal (debut; cameo)
 * Squidward Tentacles (cameo)
 * SpongeBob SquarePants (cameo)
 * Technetium (cameo)

Plot
Patrick is sent back to middle school.

Story
“OH YEAH BABY! MY NAME IS PATRICK! MY NAME IS PATRICK!” shouted Patrick, singing in the living room. “Patrick! What on Earth do you think you’re doing?!” Squidward growled, walking downstairs. “Singing my masterpiece. Duh,” Patrick responded. “That is not a masterpiece!” Squidward said. “You’re right. It’s even better than a masterpiece! It’s-It’s-It’s-” Patrick began but quickly was interrupted by his roommate. “It’s a piece of junk,” Squidward said dryly.

“That’s it! It’s a piece of junk! A piece of junk!” Patrick said proudly. “That’s not something to be proud of,” Squidward said, a deadpan tone in his voice. Suddenly a giant purple fish burst into the house. “Hey! You just broke into my house!” Squidward shouted. “No, I broke into your house,” the fish corrected. “That’s what I just said!” Squidward said. “No, it’s not,” the fish denied. “Yes it is!” Squidward argued. “Nope,” the purple fish said, a smirk on his face. “WHY DO I EVEN TRY WITH YOU PEOPLE?!” Squidward questioned. “Because you love me?” Patrick asked.

Squidward once used to live in Bikini Bottom

With neighbors SpongeBob and Patrick

But then he had enough

He couldn't take them anymore

So he moved to Coral City

And well now let's just say

It couldn't have gotten any worse!

“What are you doing here anyway?” Squidward asked. “I’m here to deliver some news to Patrick,” the purple fish stated. “No thanks, I don’t read the news,” Patrick declined. “Not that type of news. I’m the principal of Coral City Middle School. I was creepily looking through the files of former students and I realized that you never actually graduated from our school,” the principal said. “What does that mean?” Patrick asked. “It means that you’re a middle school drop-out,” Squidward explained. “OH YEAH, BABY! I’m a middle school drop-out!” Patrick exclaimed. “That’s not something to be proud of either,” Squidward said.

NEXT MORNING

Patrick had been sleeping in his bed when suddenly his alarm clock rang. “Gah! Technetium! What the hell, man?! Why’d you set the alarm so early?!” Patrick complained. “Because today’s your first day of school, remember? You can’t be late!” Technetium reminded his friend. “So? It’s seven in the morning! I’ve got the whole day ahead of me!” Patrick said. “School starts at eight,” Technetium pointed out. “Eight?! In the morning?! What in the world?! That’s way too early! It’s like they’re trying to get me to come late!” Patrick ranted.

“Don’t worry, Patrick. You’ve only got to deal with it for seven more months,” Technetium reassured. “Seven months?! That’s crazy talk! Why, I think I’d rather kill myself!” Patrick announced. “It’s futile. I’ve already hidden all the sharp objects. They’re not safe around you,” Technetium said. “Aha, but I still have these pills!” Patrick announced, whipping out a box of cyanide pills and swallowing it. “You’re not supposed to swallow the box,” Technetium said dryly. “Well, too bad! I’m dying and there’s nothing you can do about it!” Patrick shouted. “You look fine to me,” Technetium said. “Well, they take a while to kick in,” Patrick explained.

CORAL CITY MIDDLE SCHOOL

“Idiotic children, I’d like to introduce my new victim: Patrick Star!” a pink blobfish, a middle school teacher, grinned. “NNNNOOOO!!! Don’t make me! Don’t make me!” Patrick begged as his boyfriend pushed him into the classroom. “Patrick, you have to! Trust me, it’s not gonna be as bad as you think it will! Don’t you want a good education?” SpongeBob asked. “Not really,” Patrick said, a deadpan tone in his voice. “WELL, TOO BAD! YOU’RE GETTING ONE!” the sea sponge bursted, quickly storming out of the room.

Taylor then raised his hand. “What is it, you little brat?!” the blobfish growled. “Why is an adult attending a class meant for 12 year olds?” he asked. “Well, that’s because he’s mentally twelve” the blobfish said. “It’s true!” Patrick said proudly, walking over to an empty desk and sitting in it. “Hey, did you do last night’s homework?” Matthew asked. “Seriously? I just got here, dude,” Patrick said, irritated. “Well, I don’t know. I wasn’t paying attention,” Matthew said. “Hey, wait a second! You’re that kid SpongeBob wanted to adopt!” Patrick realized.

“Yeah, and then your damn squid friend kicked me out! Despite my spot on painting of him,” Matthew said, crossing his arms. “Hehe, yeah. That painting was pretty good,” Patrick admitted. “Mrs. BossyBlob! Matthew said a bad word!” one of the kids shouted out. “How about you just f***ing shut up, Travaluc! You f***ing know I would never f***ing say a f***ing bad word! So, how about you just f***ing stop lying?!” Matthew growled. “Matthew!” Mrs. BossyBlob shouted. “Yes, sir! Uh, ma’am. Whatver you are!” Matthew responded.

“To the principal’s office! Now!” she demanded. “What did I do?!” he questioned. “You said a f***ing bad word!” she shouted. “But you just said one right now!” Matthew pointed out. “Well, I’m the teacher. I don’t have to follow the rules,” Mrs. BossyBlob said. “That’s no fair!” Matthew complained. “Well, life’s no fair. Deal with it. Go to the f***ing principal’s office,” she demanded. “You know what? No! I will not go to the principal’s office! I’m tired of dealing with your f***ing shit!” Matthew growled, standing up from his desk and glaring at the other.

“Yeah! I’m tired of your shit too!” Patrick growled, getting up from his desk as well. “You’ve only been here for ten minutes!” Mrs. BossyBlob shouted. “Yeah, but in the short ten minutes that I’ve been here, you’re managed to really piss me off,” Patrick commented. “Yeah, that’s kind of what she does with everybody,” Tyler said. “YOU’RE ALL GOING STRAIGHT TO HELL!” the teacher shouted. The students blinked. “By that I mean the principal’s office,” she explained.

PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE

“Patrick! It’s your first day here and you’ve gotten in trouble! Is something wrong? Is there anything I can do to help?” the principal asked. “Yeah, you can help as firing our teacher,” Matthew replied. “I wasn’t talking to you, Mr. Krabs. I was talking to Mr. Star,” the principal pointed out. “What he said,” Patrick stated, pointing over to his friend. “...Well then. I don’t have time for this. I need to go creepily look at the files of my former students,” the principal stated, getting up and walking away from the two.

Patrick and Matthew glanced at each other, getting up and walking out of the principal’s office. “You know, Patrick. You’re pretty cool,” Matthew said. “I know I am,” Patrick smirked. Matthew rolled his eyes, smiling. However, suddenly Patrick fell down to the ground. “Patrick? Patrick, are you okay?” Matthew asked, quickly kneeling down to the ground and checking his pulse. “Gah! Gah! PATRICK! Patrick, where’s your pulse?! I-It’s not there?! Are you okay?! Patrick?! PATRICK?!” Matthew panicked.

Trivia

 * Writing for this episode began on October 23, 2015 and concluded on October 31, 2015 which makes it the fastest writng time of an episode considering Travis is lazy as fuck.
 * Travaluc's name was created by TheCreepyPastaLover.
 * Patrick and Matthew discuss the events of "From The Surface".