Temmie Begins

Temmie Begins is the pilot episode of Temmie n' Stuff. It was written by and it will air TBA.

Plot
Life as a superhero is tough, especially as you're also part of royalty. Temmie has to defeat the Joker twice whilst keeping his double life a secret from his parents and everyone around him.

Transcript
(the episode begins at night time in Temopolis, we see strange car drive around)

???: (maniacally laughs) This was totally a good idea.

????: Yes, your ideas are the best.

???: They sure are, girl buddy.

????: But one question, isn't somebody going to stop us?

???: (dies laughing) You know, I think the question should be, (it's revealed that's he's the Joker) is somebody not going to stop us? Because you know what the answer to that would be?

????: What?

Joker: Hell naw! (a strange figure appears in front of them) Damn it! Looks like we're gonna have to let the bombs out early.

?????: I'm afraid I can't let you do that.

Joker: Why not?

?????: Because... I'm Bat-

Temmie: temmie!

Batman: What?

Joker: Temmie? Augh, lucky I brought some of my little friends. (he drives off and Temmie and Batman just about dodge the car) Minions, attack! (a bunch of minions approach the two)

Temmie: hooray 4 memes! batman, stay bak. it might get dirty... cue music! (rock music starts playing in the background as Temmie takes out the minions before the actual ones arrive) i knew he would not b that dumb! (he manages to climb a building and throws some tem-a-rangs down at the villains, Batman attacks from the ground)

Batman: I think you're the one who should stay back, (punches Two-Face) these are no much from dog-cat hybrids creatures like you. (he notices Temmie is gone) What? Where's he gone? (we see Temmie jumping across rooftops until he miraculously catches up with Joker)

Temmie: justice is best served tem!

Joker: But that makes absolutely no sense! Do your parents know you're up this late?

Temmie: oh they indeed do, but i wouldn't call them just 'parents'.

Joker: Oh, is it some kind of sin to call parents 'parents'? Then what are we supposed to call them then? Friends? Relatives? Strangers? Lord Majesty Dictators? Dictators, I like that word, write it down, Quinn.

????: OK, sir.

Temmie: they r more lord a more majesty than u would think, u so called clown prince. in fact, it would indeed b a sin to call them anything but what they realy r!

Joker: And what's that implying? I'm pretty sure they have more authority than I do, scum.

Temmie: u take that back!

Batman: (catching up with them) Why not take that 'bat'?

Temmie: batman? i said it woudn b safe 4 u to follow!

Batman: Uh, no. You said it might get dirty.

Temmie: oh yeah.

Joker: Enough of your rambling-

Batman: It was only four lines of the script.

Joker: Yeah but every line counts. So where was I? Oh yeah. Enough of your rambling, it's only a matter of time until I steal the key to the city!

Temmie: i've always wondered if cities literally hav keys to da city because what would they needs to open? i mean, it would make more sense 4 a key to da city to b a metaphoric way o symbolising complete power a control, unless that is exactly what it is implying...

Joker: (pause) That literally makes no sense. Anyhow, we're here. Harley, unleash the bombs!

Harley Quinn: Of course, boy buddy. (the car stops with the heroes and she pulls a bomb out of the trunk and throws it at the mayor's office)

Batman: Ugh, you literally just let them take over the city?

Temmie: nope, it's all part o da plan. just play along...

Batman: You think this is some kind of game? Batman was never a part of this. (he attaches his grappling hook to something and shoots off as the smoke in the office clears away revealing the mayor holding the key)

Joker: Finally! (he gets out the car and approaches the mayor) Complete control is mine! (he snatches the key) And for my first command, the monarchy will-

Mayor: (starts laughing) You really think you just gained complete control of the city?

Joker: (confused) Well, yeah. I mean I have the key.

Mayor: That's not the key to the city! That's just the key to the girl's restroom! (Harley Quinn gets out the car and smacks the Joker)

Joker: What? You thought I knew that?

Temmie: u're plan is spoiled, joker. (jumps down from the building) why don u run bak to da circus?

Mayor: Nice to finally see you, Joker. I'm the mayor, as you know, but please just call me Sandy.

Joker: Hi, uh, Sandy.

Sandy: Did you really think Temopolis had a 'key to the city'? (takes the key back) It's just a cheap way to symbolise someone gaining power!

Joker: I knew that, I knew that!

Temmie: once again da heroes foiled u're little plan. victory screech! (Sandy and him screech)

Joker: Please, go easy on the ears. Come on, girl buddy. We're leaving. (he and Harley drive away)

Sandy: I do have to hand it to ya, we really got him good. It's late, you should head back to the palace before the King find out.

Temmie: yaYA!! see u tomorrow! (Temmie whistles, summoning the Tem-mobile and he leaves) tem-mobile, take me bak to tem palace.

Tem-mobile Computer: Okay, Master Tem. (we see Temmie sneak back into the palace via the top window that leads to his bedroom)

Temmie: it is goods to b home, better get rested in case there's any crime that needs to b taken care o tomorrow. (he climbs into bed as the time changes to morning)

King Tem: (entering the room) Prince Temmie, breakfast is ready. Prince Temmie? PRINCE TEMMIE! (Temmie wakes up)

Temmie: uh, father. im so sorry i slept in. i had a wonderful dream.

King Tem: That's OK. Now please go downstairs. We mustn't keep Squidward waiting.

Temmie: Oks, dad. (transition to the dining room as the family enjoy their meal)

Squidward: Please do not take long. I already need to dust the house twice.

King Tem: Do not argue with the king's orders, butler.

Squidward: I'll have you know that I am not arguing, you're highness. It's just that I'm working for the king and get less pay than a plumber.

Mario: (through the winder) It's not easy scrubbing Peach's pipes you know! (leaves)

Queen Tem: so, son. what was dis dream all about?

Temmie: im afraid that is confidential. it's a violation o da dream code law or something, i think. (finishes eating) im gonna play in my room now.

King Tem: OK, Prince Temmie. Don't cause any mischief. (Temmie enters the lift) Oh yeah, Squidward!

Squidward: Yes?

King Tem: Don't forget to polish the prince's crown.

Squidward: I won't forget to polish the prince's crown. (we see Temmie in the lift, he presses a button at the bottom of it which is half broken and the floor number is scraped away. The lift goes down and he exits to a place resembling a gym)

Temmie: a now 4 some narration. (he does some push-ups on a bar as he speaks) my name is temmie but everyones insists on calling me prince temmie. as da name implies i am da prince o temopolis. why only that one city? well, nobody realy liked da tem species until a few years ago where president obama signed a peace treaty. it meant that other species could now enter da city but da monarchy stayed da same. on our end o da deal da mayor had to b changed to a responsible outsider, sandy cheeks. 4 their end da royal butler had to b a outsider too. besides b being prince, i am also a superhero. sure i don hav a super alto-ego but every tem except da king, queen a me wearing my crown look da same. o course, i don fight alone. da mayor helps me along with my butler squidward a dis weird guy called batman insists that he does all da work. why? because he's batman. i keep trying to tell him that that makes no sense but he wont listen. why? because he's batman. my parents don know im a superhero but couldn't care less if they found out. i keep my super life secret from them nonetheless though. right now i am in my personal private gym. they don know about dis either. dis is where i train to b super a what not. there isn't realy anything else to say except why i became a superhero a why im talking to u but i don realy talk about that. (he stops what he is is doing and goes back the lift and goes to his bedroom, there he dons his crown) im just about to do my daily drive around town, u shud come too. (we cut to the monarchy driving around town waving to the public with Squidward driving)

King Tem: Ah, this is nice. I just love our daily drive-around-towns.

Squidward: But why do we have them though? I mean, what purpose does it serve?

King Tem: I told you not to question the king's thinking.

Squidward: You said not to argue with the king's orders. Am I the only sane one here?

Temmie: tem is sane.

Squidward: No you're not. You know what you are? A 'tard.

Temmie: (shocked, he gasps) he called me a 'tard! (starts crying)

King Tem: This is unacceptable! A million years dungeon!

Squidward: You are joking, right?

King Tem: Of course. You will be severely punished though. (through the mirrors, Temmie sees the Joker and Harley Quinn catching up with them, he snatches a cardboard cut-out of himself someone is holding of himslef with his grappling hook and places it in his spot in the car as he jumps out leaving his crown behind)

Temmie: yaYA!! (looks at the audience and proceeds in Liam Neeson's voice) What? My parents are really dumb, even if I shouldn't mock the monarchy. (his voice goes back to normal as he pulls out his cell phone and calls Sandy) joker a harley r right on top o da monarchy, send backup, now!

Sandy: (from call) Me and my SWAT team are on our way! (Temmie runs into a phone box and comes back out in a police officer suit)

Temmie: it's not illegal if u basically r one! (he redirects the traffic to an alternate route which slows down the villains)

Joker: WHAT? Argh!

Harley Quinn: We're villains, can't we just avoid traffic laws?

Joker: If we drove through the cones our car would be dead meat and I spend ages acquiring the money to buy it.

Harley Quinn: You stole it, boy buddy.

Joker: Put what I just said in a metaphoric way and there you go! (Temmie follows them as they go the alternate roote and Sandy appears with the SWAT team)

Sandy: We're here. I would suggest you block them from the front and we'll come from behind.

Temmie: cool, but what if they drive through me?

Batman: (appearing from the darkness) Then, I'll trap him from above. My butler Alfred has been taking knitting courses so I asked him to knit me the biggest piece of cloth ever. I luckily have it with me so I can climb up that building and throw it down on them!

Temmie: batman, im sorry i ever doubted u.

Batman: Apology accepted. Now we better move fast! (Temmie, Sandy and the SWAT team leg it to the Joker's car and Temmie uses his grappling hook to grab onto the car and jumps to the front whilst ripping off his police uniform to reveal his normal clothes)

Temmie: end o da line!

Joker: Oh, I'm sorry. This isn't Thomas the Tank Engine!

Harley Quinn: Joker, I'll take it from here. (she jumps out of the car and threatens Temmie with her hammer as Sandy and her crew catch up)

Sandy: Thought you could even get far with your scheme this time? NOW! (Batman drops the cloth on him and notices the threats by Harley)

Batman: S**t, she's getting away!

Squidward: (jumps in front of Harley and Temmie) Not on my watch! (he threatens Harley with his gun and she backs off and falls on the cloth)

Sandy: Back to Arkham for you two.

Temmie: squidward?

Squidward: It's me, buddy.

Temmie: huh?

Squidward: Listen, I knew about your double life ever since I was dusting the elevator ages ago. Don't worry, I won't tell if you won't. I'm a superhero now.

Temmie: dat all nice a all, but who's driving da car? (we cut to Patrick driving the monarchy's car)

Patrick: I'm Squidward, I'm Squidward. I'm Squidward Squidward Squidward.

Queen Tem: well, i do say darling. (episode ends)