Absorbent TV

About
The Channel is owned by Cosmobo and started on the 16th of the 3rd in 2015. The Channel currently airs Channel Chasers, Rags to Riches, Basket Sponge, Reckless and Retired and Sponge Reaper.

Slogan
If nautical nonsense be something you wish.

Ads
Ad 1:

[shows SpongeBob watching a film at night with Gary]

[SpongeBob is sitting on the floor eating popcorn]

SpongeBob: I heard this film has a right big twist at the end!

Gary: Meow...

SpongeBob: No no! don't tell me the twist!

Gary: [sighs]

[scene goes into the TV showing a cop arresting a criminal]

Cop: You're going to prison for a long time!

Criminal: But I'm your brother!

Cop: NO! IT CAN'T BE!

Criminal: Haha! see you later!

[shows the criminal run off]

[scene goes back to SpongeBob]

SpongeBob: I I...is that it?!

Gary: Meow...

SpongeBob: WHAT THE BARNACLES WAS THAT?! I just I just couldn't absorb the film!

[shows Gary nudge a laptop to SpongeBob]

SpongeBob: Haha! thanks Gary! what's this?

Gary: Meow

SpongeBob: A fanon wiki? What is this? Who is Cosmobo?

Gary: Meow

SpongeBob: A user? oh look featured article!

Gary: Meow

SpongeBob: I should read it? ok...

[2 HOURS LATER]

SpongeBob: This is something I can absorb all these spin-offs are awesome!

Gary: Meow

SpongeBob: Well I have to say I loved the one where we played basket ball with the guy who plays for the real life team!

Gary: Meow

SpongeBob: And the one where we are in the TV! oh look Gary it's you!

Gary: Meow?

SpongeBob: You scared the cave ponies away!

Gary: [rolls eyes]

[The ad ends]

Ad 2:

[shows Patrick looking at some squiggly lines]

Patrick: I LOVE THIS PART!

[shows the squiggly lines go off]

Patrick: HEY! I LOVE THAT PART!

[shows the TV start showing Channel Chasers]

Patrick: Channel Chasers?! I don't want to watch that!

[shows Patrick throw his remote at the TV showing Rags to Riches]

Eugene: Clam poop and a used bra.

Patrick: Hehe clam poop!

[The customer vomits on the Plab Patty.]

Sheldon: Hey, I'm back. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED OVER HERE?

Eugene: I told him the ingredients.

Sheldon: Why?

Eugene: I was being honest.

Sheldon: HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL?

Eugene: (imitates the voice of the Vine kid) Twenty-one.

Patrick: Hey that was good!

[shows SpongeBob jump into Patrick's house]

SpongeBob: Hey Patrick! what ya watching?!

Patrick: Riches to Rags!

SpongeBob: Don't you mean Rags to Riches?

Patrick: Yeah how do you know?

SpongeBob: I stayed up all night and watched all the spin-offs ever made!

Patrick: How many times did you watch Rags to Riches?

SpongeBob: (imitates the voice of the Vine kid) Twenty-one.

Patrick: Oh so you watched it?

SpongeBob: [sighs] yes...why do you think I did the impression?

Patrick: Because your sidekick?

SpongeBob: [sighs] no...

[The ad ends]

Ad 3:

[shows Squidward watching TV in his house]

Squidward: Ah...the sun is shining and the birds are whistling...

[SpongeBob laughs outside]

Squidward: AND SPONGEBOB IS LAUGHING!

[shows Squidward walk up stairs to his window]

Squidward: WILL YOU 2 DUNDER HEADS BE QUIET?!

SpongeBob: That wasn't us!

Squidward: OH YES IT WAS!

SpongeBob: No it was a spin-off!

Squidward: WHY DON'T YOU SPIN-OFF A MOUNTAIN AND LET ME HAVE A QUIET DAY OFF WORK?!

SpongeBob: Don't you like Spin-offs?

Squidward: I do not like spin-offs! now let me watch rich people show off their mansions!

[shows Squidward walk back into his house and walk down stairs and sit back down to watch TV]

Squidward: Now who's on house fancy?

[shows Lebron James on house fancy]

Squidward: Who is he?!

Lebron James: Well yeah with the success of the spin-off I have been able to get myself a mansion...

Squidward: Spin-off?

Lebron James: I can't wait to be in new episodes...

Squidward: Ugh yeah...bye bye!

[shows Squidward switch the channel]

Perch Perkins: Local boy finds himself in hospital after he finds out the secret formula of the Plab Patty!

Squidward: What is a Plab Patty?

Perch Perkins: Yes this an old news story I know! but after the success of the spin-off he is now owning his own restaurant!

Squidward: Tell someone who cares!

[Squidward switches the channel]

Advert: Have mini people got sucked into your TV? If they have call us! We are the Channel Chasers! We will help!

[Squidward switches the channel again]

Advert: Come to our retirement home...are you reckless?

Squidward: No...

Advert: Or retired? If you are come to Bikini Bottom retirement home

Squidward: That's it! If there's any more references to Spin-offs on my TV I will go crazy!

[Squidward switches the channel]

[shows the screen go dark]

[shows Cosmo from FOP come up]

Cosmo: We are also on Nick! my name is Cosmo and I'm wearing a bow tie!

Squidward: STOP THE WIKIA REFERENCES!THAT IS A USER REFERENCE! AND IT DOES NOT EVEN MAKE SENSE!

Shows
Channel Chasers

Rags to Riches

Basket Sponge

Reckless and Retired

Sponge Reaper

SpongeBob's Big Adventures

The SpongeBob SquarePants Adult Party Cartoon

Planning
Channel Chasers:Channel Crossers 20:45

Channel Chasers:Add Searchers 21:21

Basket Sponge:A Legend Begins 21:50

Rags to Riches:Humble Beginnings 22:10

Reckless and Retired:Chum Bucket List 22:15

Reckless and Retired:When Death Comes Knocking 22:49

Rags to Riches:Two Unlikely Friends 00:10

Basket Sponge:Practice Makes Perfect 00:45

Channel Chasers:Spongebob HeroPants 1:10

Reckless and Retired:Bingo Murder 1:33

Channel Chasers:Pony Trouble 2:10

Rags to Riches:Young Entrepreneurs 2:35

Basket Sponge:The Shoes of Jordan 3:00

Basket Sponge:Prisoners of The Match 3:11

Reckless and Retired:The Golden Chopsticks 3:45

Rags to Riches:Four-Leaf Algae 4:19

Sponge Reaper:Becometh the Shinagami

Sponge Reaper:The Matrix Proposal

Channel Chasers:Pony Trouble Part 2