Son Of A Fool

Son Of A Fool is the fourth episode of the first season of The Ruler of the Seven Seas. It is the fourth episode overall.

Synopsis
Pearl teaches Agent Travis Platypus and Patrick how to be teenagers so they can participate in the Bikini Bottom High School class president election against Gillary Fisherton's son Chad.

Transcript
It was 1985, and the movie theatre was jam-packed, with sold-out seats for Back To Those Nasty Fish. Too bad the front seats were occupied by Travis and Tyce. “Hey, your nasty rear end is destroying my appetite! My food will be ruined by that!” a fish behind Travis complained. Travis turned around, and looked at the sea chicken the fish was eating. “Ew, chicken! You are obviously hurting our fragile enviornment! Why can’t you pick and chew someone your own size, you industrial murdering brat? Eat some chewy leaves and plants. And I saw that Jeep of yours in the parking lot, do you know how much miles per gallon a Jeep has? None, they just dump oil on the road so a passerby deer can get infected and die!” Travis screamed. “You know, plants are living things too! Now shut up!” the fish replied, annoyed. A frustrated Travis lost his temper, pulled down his pants, and shoved his bare rear end into the face of the fish. As the fish swelled of sweat from the nasty stench, other fish began to get angry. “Tyce, do something!” Travis screamed. “Oh, I know what to do!” Tyce said, calling 911 and reporting Travis. “NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Travis bellowed.

“Hey Patrick, quit that TV! We’ve got an election, and this Kingshire Entertainment original sitcom to run!” SpongeBob yelled.

The Krusty Krab was abandoned, as Pearl had a tantrum. “Daddy, please!” Pearl screamed. “Dropping out of high school is something you won’t regret!” Mr. Krabs replied. “Daddy, I have friends! I can’t drop out! I’m not a minority!” Pearl sobbed. “Technically speaking, you are a whale in a land of fish—” Mr. Krabs said when Pearl slapped him. “I want to graduate and become a fashion designer, not a manager of this smelly greasetrap!” Pearl cried. “But it’s my greasetrap! And you can always go to your stupid little school after the election, right?” Krabs asked. “WE HAVE TWO YEARS! And, it’s night school! I’ll be in with smelly and unacceptable old men,” Pearl said. “Oh come on, no one could be more smellier and unacceptable than Agent Platypus! Believe me,” Krabs said coldly. “It’s all that stupid sponge’s fault! He just has to run for a position people spent their lives wishing for! And not to mention hiring a stupid crew, like Agent Platypus. Wait, does he even know yet?” Pearl asked. “Uhhh…,” Mr. Krabs paused.

Dr. Reginald Tyson gave mouth-to-mouth CPR to Agent Platypus, who has fallen unconscious hearing news of him joining the SpongeBob campaign. He finally woke up, to see Tyce’s lips touching his. “Oooh, Tyce! You saved me!” Platypus said romantically. He grabbed Tyce’s shoulders and moved his body towards him. Kelp Garrison suddenly intervened, shoving Tyce away from Travis. “Get your bloody hands off my man...uh, I mean my dear friend!” Kelp Garrison said. “He’s mine...anyways, what happened?” Platypus asked. “We joined the SpongeBob campaign crew,” Kelp replied. “Wait...really,” Platypus stuttered before fainting yet again. “Oh crap...get him into the boat, we need to see SpongeBob. Also, you give him mouth to mouth,” Dr. Reginald Tyson said. Kelp groaned.

Kelp Garrison’s boat pulled into the Krusty Krab, and Mr. Krabs showed outside. “Hello, I’m Mr. Krabs your manager!” Krabs greeted Kelp. “Cool. Anyways, do you have any political experience?” Reginald asked. “Uh...well...erm...oh yes, I recieved several honorary doctorates from all twelve major campuses,” Krabs replied hesitantly. Patrick’s boat then pulled up, with SpongeBob inside. Agent Platypus just woke up again and ran to SpongeBob. “Oh! Thank you! Thank you!” Platypus sobbed in joy. “Hey, you saved us from the police! And you are a political obsessive...I mean, aspiring scholar,” SpongeBob said. Squidward’s spirit suddenly came up. “Hey, when did you learn to make smart jokes?” Squidward asked. “Well, it’s how this show is written. I mean, why are you here? You’re supposed to be on Death Row,” SpongeBob said. “Actually, I’m more into jazz than hip-hop. Although I bought this 2Pac cassette once and—” Squidward said when SpongeBob slapped him. “I don’t want to hear about your 90s music on my politics show! Go away!” SpongeBob yelled. “Ugh,” Squidward snorted as his spirit faded away.

The whole building shook, as Pearl roared from the inside. Everyone rushed inside. “Well...I...I don’t want to go to school! Gillary’s snotty son Chad is running for...president!” Pearl sobbed. “Wait, Gillary’s son is running?” Patrick asked. “Maybe we can blackmail Chad to find something about Gillary!” SpongeBob said excitedly. “Squidward was right, you do act smart in this series,” Krabs moaned. “But who here is dumb enough to be teenagers? And how are they gonna fit in?” Patrick asked when everyone turned to him and Agent Platypus. Pearl stopped crying and made a smile. “It’s time for a makeover!” Pearl grinned. “Uh-oh,” Patrick and Platypus said together, looking at each other’s faces.

Pearl just finished the makeover, and gave a mirror to Agent Platypus and Patrick. “Holy crap!” they said in unison.

A few days later, Agent Platypus and Patrick were admitted into high school, and went into the principal’s office. “Mr. Star, we are letting you into this school because of your age. We reviewed your record, and we have decided for you to skip 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th grade. Geniuses with a 200 IQ would die for this? You too can enter this school, Mr. Platypus,” the Principal said. “If geniuses would die for this, why would they go for it? Not every genius is suicidal,” Agent Platypus said. “Figurative expression. You’ll be learning that in English Class, Room 225 when the bell rings...in 5 seconds,” the Principal said. Five seconds later, the bell rung. Platypus and Patrick ran to English class, where there were 2 empty seats, to the left and right of a student.

“Good morning, I’m Mr. Fluff. I’m saying that because we have two new students, Travis and Patrick. Now, let’s take attendance,” the teacher said. As the teacher called out names, Patrick groaned. “Why can’t anyone else do this? I dropped out of kindergarten for a reason?” Patrick reasoned. “I know, right! Let’s get out of here!” Agent Platypus replied. Then, Mr. Fluff called on Chad. “Wait, Chad! We have to take him down!” Patrick whispered. “Yes, in a completely civil manner,” Platypus replied. They froze for a moment. “It’s go time,” Platypus said.

“YOU ARE NOT THE RULER OF THE SEVEN SEAS!” Patrick yelled as he jumped on Chad. The rest of the students circled the scene and recorded it. “Who the hell are you?” Chad groaned as he was being punched. Finally, the principal arrived. The two looked at the Principal, who’s face was red. “No wonder you dropped out of Kindergarten,” the Principal said.

Agent Platypus and Patrick hung their heads as Kelp Garrison entered the principal’s office. Kelp was notified of a “moderate disturbance at the school” on his phone. “As they have not completed a thing of education, as well as for assaulting Chad, they are expelled from this premises,” the Principal said. “Hahaha!,” Patrick yelled.

As Kelp drove home Agent Platypus and Patrick, he kept making faces at them. “What’s the matter?” Patrick asked. “Well, I hope you too would actually learn something,” Kelp replied. “Eh, we know better than Tyce,” Platypus blurted out. “Yeah, you’re right,” Kelp said.

Trivia

 * This is the first episode where Patrick has a main role.