List of Patrick's New Life episodes/Season 1

1. Goodbye Bikini Bottom, Hello Starville: After being taunted and laughed at by Squidward for doing numerous foolish things, Patrick leaves Bikini Bottom, against the wishes of his friends (except Squidward), for Starville, where he buys a house sold for free next to the House of the Mayor and gets to meet Mayor Alastair MacFish and Vice-Mayor Tattletale Strangler when they visited Patrick, who still wants revenge at Patrick's best friend SpongeBob (see the SBSP Season 3 episode SpongeBob Meets the Strangler on how the Strangler meets SpongeBob) and seeks to remove Patrick as soon as possible.

First appearance: Patrick Star, Alastair MacStar, Tattletale Strangler, SpongeBob SquarePants, Squidward Tentacles, Sandy Cheeks, Patty Rechid, Ty Cobbstar, Jack Beanstar.

2. No More, Clarinet-a-James: SpongeBob, Sandy and Squidward (reluctantly) pay a visit to Patrick in Starville. Patrick brings them to the Clarinet Palace to attend lessons from national clarinetist celebrity (and Squidward's idol) James "Clarinet-a-James" Clarinetstar. Squidward's horrible playing causes disaster, and Clarinetstar gives Squidward a week to improve his clarinet playing, otherwise he'll leave Starville and force the Clarinet Palace into bankruptcy.

First appearance: James "Clarinet-a-James" Clarinetstar, Selma Clarinetstar, Quentin Tay, Anna Tay, Ollie Ettimoore, Chris Doneganstar, P. E. P. S. I. Hooray.

3. Community Patrick: Patrick is forced to do community service for 47 hours, 59 minutes and 59 seconds after littering in front of Jay Giftstar's gift shop, the Starville Gift Shop, but he only adds more littering. Mayor MacStar and Vice-Mayor Strangler get into a televised (Patrick's idea) debate on what to do with Patrick, with Strangler suggesting that Patrick be executed and MacStar sending Patrick to a mental institution. The debate is inconclusive.

First appearance: Judge Pietro MacStar, Jay Giftstar, Mary-Sue Giftstar.

4. Patrick-o-Advertise: Jay and Mary-Sue Giftstar hire Patrick as the cashier in their Starville Gift Shop. Patrick messes up with his job, but instead of firing him, Jay exploits Patrick as a tool for television advertising. "Mr. Gift Hero" becomes suddenly popular and, aside from appearing in commercials, Patrick is trusted to give gifts to customers after Jay deals with the payment.

5. President the Stupid: A series of mistakes in procedures result in Patrick, instead of Mayor Alastair MacFish, being nominated for President of the United Cities of Bottom. With the other candidates withdrawing in protest of an idiot being nominated, Patrick is automatically elected President and started making policies which are either foolish or totalitarian in nature, so former President Joshua Swad instigates a national revolution to return to power.

First appearance: Joshua Swad.

6. Me, The Judge and The Clarinetist: Patrick and his new friend, none other than Judge Pietro MacStar, attend a James Clarinetstar lesson in the Clarinet Palace, only to be told, along with all other students, that Clarinetstar is planning for a clarinet show on the stage. Patrick and the others train rigorously in preparation for the show.

7. Stop the Debate: The citizens of Starville travel to "human land" with Sandy Cheeks as the guide. Traveling to San Francisco, Patrick mistakes the dynamites for bottles and mislead the other Starvillians into believing him. Finding that the bottles cannot be used, Patrick and the Starvillians throw it to the Golden Gate Bridge, blowing up parts of it. As Patrick faces life imprisonment, Sandy tries to negotiate with city authorities to ensure Patrick's release.

8. No Smoking is Star: Patrick and the gate guards Ty Cobbstar and Jack Beanstar appear in an anti-smoking commercial. Patrick mistakes a lit cigarette in the commercial for a drinking straw and takes it right before the camera. Patrick soon finds himself becoming a star as a result of the commercial while smoking every single day. He realizes that he hates being a star and tries to stop smoking and put the commercial out of broadcast.

9. The Starville Bowl: Cobbstar and Beanstar volunteer to join the underachieving Starville Rockets in the Starville Bowl against the Starville Jets. In a major upset, the Rockets win and football teams from neighboring cities try to take Cobbstar and Beanstar. When Mayor MacStar refuses to let them leave Starville, representatives from other cities come to fight against each other, including against Starville's representative with the winner to take the two.

Note: First episode not to feature Patrick as the main character.

10. Patrick the Journalist: Part 1 (A History of Glory): Patrick poses as a journalist and asks some of the more older men in Starville of their involvement in the Bikini Bottom Naval Mutiny of 1969.

First appearance: Mr. Krabs (flashback), the Bikini Bottom Naval Mutineers of 1969.

11. Patrick the Journalist: Part 2 (Alastair on the Fast Lane): Patrick asks Mayor Alastair MacFish of his years as an underwater champion racer and why he shouted "Holyfield madman!" while attending the second Holyfield-Tyson fight in June 1997 (for which Alastair made the Sports Illustrated cover in July) despite the fact "that in that fight, Tyson was the true madman".

12. Patrick the Journalist: Part 3 (The Magnate's Daughter): Patrick asks fellow James Clarinetstar class student Ollie Ettiemoore on why she ran away from home and the unimaginative strict, business-like life under his father, business magnate Albert Ettiemoore.

First appearance: Albert Ettiemoore (flashback).

13. Read My Lips: More and More Taxes: After an economic downturn, Mayor Alastair announces that he is raising existing taxes and creating new ones. The public enraged, Patrick steps in to find a solution to the downturn "with my stupidity" and eliminate the necessity of raising and creating new taxes.

14. The Sea Dragon's Curse: Having been rude to Uno the Sea Dragon (whom he views as a "stinky monster") Patrick is given credit for motivating Uno to place a 1000-year curse on the gift shop. Patrick, Jay and Mary-Sue go to Uno's lair and have to complete several puzzles to lift the curse. Eventually, Uno becomes the new cashier, while Patrick (much to his happiness) becomes a janitor as the lair is bulldozed for a real estate project.

First appearance: Uno the Sea Dragon.

15. The Starville Gift Shop Training Video: A training video for the Starville Gift Shop directed by Jay and Mary-Sue, starring Patrick, Mayor Alastair and Vice-Mayor Strangler, who uses the opportunity to try remove Patrick from the scene.

16. Coin Scare: Part 1: After homeless Sano Torino enters a coma after touching a coin on the street, a "coin scare" ensues in Starville as people avoid using coins. Patrick finds out that the coin Torino discovers is actually intended to kill Patrick (whose house is right in front of the place Torino finds the coin) but somehow misses the target. However, instead of securing the arrest of Tattletale Strangler, Patrick accuses "bad environment" for "poisoning" the coin, rendering the results ineffective.

First appearance: Sano Torino.

17. Coin Scare: Part 2: Uno is unconvinced of Patrick's investigation and launches his own investigation, concluding that Strangler is indeed behind the coin. He and Patrick go to the Starville Hospital where Torino regains consciousness and reports seeing a mailman dropping the coin. Asking mailmen in Starville, Uno and Patrick instead comes to a conclusion that the coin has been accidentally exposed to dangerous chemicals, and the investigation is closed without any clear result.

First appearance: Jack the Mailman, The Mailmen Association of Starville.

18. The Strange Story of an Encyclopaedia: The Starville government commissions an encyclopedia, titled the Encyclopaedia Starvillica. Patrick recruits Sandy, Mr. Krabs and also Tattletale Strangler to make the encyclopedia. Strangler hires a group of thugs to kill Patrick while he is reviewing Strangler's revisions, but the thugs are instead recruited by Krabs as he hunts for the supposedly magical Crystal of Starville in the forests near Starville, further delaying the encyclopedia's completion.

First appearance: Mr. Krabs (present-day).

19. You Furnish the Paper, I Furnish the Chaos: As a result of sagging sales, Jay Giftstar starts the Giftstar Examiner newspaper to make sensationalist and highly unrealistic articles about the gifts in the shop while revealing highly-classified government "trade" information. When collectors from all over the seas come to take the government's (instead of the shop's) belongings, Mayor MacStar declares martial law and Patrick is sent to persuade the Mayor to change his mind.

20. Riding the Stupidity Wave: Jockcar and Sons Company is asked to make a limousine for the Mayor and Vice-Mayor. They recruit Patrick (seen as an ideal designer) to make the limousine. Despite having a reported value of US$1.500.000, Patrick's limousine turns out to be a monstrosity, with an extremely noise engine, nearly nonfunctional steering, leaking roof, a radio only able to produce a noisy "Ooooo" sound and bright light from lamps causing temporary blindness. The company declares bankruptcy and Patrick returns to the gift shop.

First appearance: Jockcar and Sons Company, Javier Greenstar, Millie Greenstar, Silius Sconstar, Alastair's Robot, Old Man Jenkins.