Pet Zoo Castle

Pet Zoo Castle is the second episode of Times in New Kelp City.

Transcript
[SpongeBob and Patrick are walking in downtown New Kelp City]

SpongeBob: So... why are we walking downtown again?

Patrick: Because this walk will give us something to d-

[He sees something, which is revealed to be a Pizza Castle]

Patrick: Pizza Castle!

SpongeBob: Man! I never been to this place.

Patrick: Trust me, this is heaven for Pizza here.

''[They go into the restaurant and the two look around. Patrick goes up to the counter and reads the menu.]''

Patrick: Man! Kelp Fries, Super Chips, Pizza! Kelp Pizza! Cheese Pizza! Cheese Kelp Pizza! And holy starfishes! Super Cheese Kelp Pizza With Extra Suger Pizza! I'm getting that for sure today!

SpongeBob: Pat!

[He turns around to just see something behind SpongeBob]

Patrick: That can't be. I only dreamed of that!

[He walks right through SpongeBob like he was a door]

Patrick: They are hiring!

SpongeBob: Wow! You can get a job to finally get something to do and to get some cash!

Patrick: [he is reading the poster] No way! With that, there is a discount of 30% on any purchase here. And man! You get monthly, an exclusive, special, top of the line package of special Pizza and its amazing sides! For sure I'm getting this job!

PC Employee: Oh! Starfish, I see you want to have this job. Just sign this sheet with your name!

[He puts "qat" on the sheet]

PC Employee: Close enough. Now just wait. [he disappears for a few seconds and then reappears] Here's the reminder card. Also remember: Tomorrow, on noon in this exact location! [he disappears again]

Patrick: What?

SpongeBob: Don't worry, I'll bring you to the Pizza Castle for tomorrow, anyways, I have no work for tomorrow!

[bubble transition]

[SpongeBob and Patrick are at the Krusty Krab kitchen]

SpongeBob: Now Pat, to make you look presentable, you have to be fancy!

Patrick: I am already great!

SpongeBob: But there still can be more great!

[A mortgage of SpongeBob making him fancy by wearing him formal clothing and teaching him proper ways]

SpongeBob: Man, you look sharp!

[close up of Patrick in fancy clothing]

Patrick: Well, this doesn't feel right.

SpongeBob: Don't worry, this will stay stuck until tomorrow after you come home. Then you can start dreaming of that monthly package.

[Patrick starts to drool, but SpongeBob slaps]

SpongeBob: But we first start have to sleep!

[bubble transition]

[SpongeBob and Patrick are in front of the Pizza Castle]

SpongeBob: Pat, go on.

[He starts to slowly walk to the doors]

Patrick: SpongeBob, is it me or does it seem like I didn't get much sleep?

SpongeBob: Yea, it isn't you. I feel still a bit tired.

Patrick: [walking to the door] Yea, SpongeBob. Anyways, bye!

''[He goes through the doors. Patrick in the Pizza Castle sees the dining room to be very packed with people]''

Patrick: [walking through the place] Woah. [he bumps into a person]

Fish 1: Hey!

[He doesn't pay attention and he is hits another one]

Fish 2: Well, excuse you for improper manners!

[He doesn't pay attention again and bumps into another one]

Fish 3: Hey! B- Shoot! It is a stupidtowner!

Patrick: Well thanks!

[He looks around]

Patrick: Where do I go?

''[A long arm from a door in the background grabs Pat's shoulder and he gets pulled into a dark room. Then the lights turn on to show a man.]''

PC Interviewer: [talking to a walkie-talkie] Man, this guy's stupid. [notices Pat] Oh hey! I for this interview will be asking you questions! So lets get into the questions. 1. How old are you?

Patrick: Pineapples?

PC Interviewer: [talking to his walkie-talkie] Age: Pineapples? Well for sure that will make us look stupid after putting it into the database... Oh, um, Quack? Will you mind if I look in your wallet?

Patrick: For what?

PC Interviewer: [sweating] To... um... well, find some candy?

Patrick: Sure! [gives his wallet to him]

PC Interviewer: [going through his wallet as he talks to his walkie-talkie] Man this guy's one big joke. [finds his National Identity Card] Hmmm... [he reads through as these stats of him are shown:


 * Name: Patrick D. Star
 * Age: 23
 * Born: June 9, 1984
 * Birth Place: ????
 * Occupation: N/A
 * Arrests: 2
 * Address: 120 Conch Street UPDATING (in pen)]

PC Interviewer: 23? This is one young stupid. [gives back his wallet]

Voice on Walkie-Talkie: Maybe his stupidity with his young age can make him a joke to trick. Also looking on Stingray that his posts are stupid. Also links to an account called "Squidward J. Tentacles" that has commonly throughout the feed has posts of Patrick and "SpongeBob" annoying him to death. Also there is one about when he tricked them into going into a false scavenger hunt.

PC Interviewer: Patrick? That's his name? His signature said "Qat."

Voice on Walkie-Talkie: Well, we have so much of his records of his buys here, that we know a lot about him.

Patrick: Who are you talking to?

PC Interviewer: The people who confirms if there are candy in your wallet. Anyways, lets go to the next question-

Voice on Walkie-Talkie: Just hire him.

PC Interviewer: What?

Voice on Walkie-Talkie: Hire him. I'll call you tonight to plan the tricking out.

PC Interviewer: Your hired, Pat. Come... when will he come?

Voice on Walkie-Talkie: Monday.

PC Interviewer: Monday!

Patrick: Yay! [goes right through the door, punching a hole through it]

[bubble transition]

[Patrick and SpongeBob are walking to their respective jobs]

Patrick: -and he said that I am coming Monday!

SpongeBob: [tiredly] So today?

Patrick: Yes!

SpongeBob: [yawns] Sorry Pat to break it to you, but we have been walking around the Krusty Krab for a hour straight while you've been telling the same story for 86 times in a row.

Patrick: Then what do I do?

SpongeBob: Go to work! You anyways have your employee card, which mean you can going in the store before the opening. Also I like that the employee card is chew and eatable proof!

[Patrick is chewing his card, but he spits it out with fire coming out of his mouth]

Patrick: Hot! Hot! Hot!

[He gulps down a gallon bottle of milk]

Patrick: Oh, okay.

[He walks away from SpongeBob and to the back door of the Pizza Caslte]

Patrick: [reading the sign besides the door] To get in, scan? Scan. Can your employee card on the canner. I don't see any canner?

''[Patrick takes a can from the trash, puts his employee card in and throws it at the door. The interviewer from before sighs in disappointment and he opens the door and takes in Patrick.]''

PC Interviewer: [sighs] From now on, just knock on the door and then I'll come.

Patrick: Sorry.

''[A line of Pizza falls from the top of the screen to the bottom as a transition to the next scene. Patrick and the Interviewer are at the Kitchen.]''

PC Interviewer: Okay, it will be Training Day for you. There will be three simple jobs you can take on. This is the first- [Patrick rises his hand] Um, yes?

Patrick: When will I get my first top of the line package of special Pizza and more?

PC Interviewer: [he cracks an evil smile] Soon... Anyways, this first job is on putting the toppings on Pizza. Nothing else for now. There are three variations - None, Average, Overflowing. None is none. Average is just enough and Overflowing is somewhat more. Now as the test, show me an "Overflowing" amount of toppings.

[he is waiting]

Patrick: Done!

[The PC Interviewer drops his mouth in surprise as a huge mountain of cheese is seen on and covering the counter]

PC Interviewer: Well, Topper is out of the window.

Patrick: Uh, I thought already that was overflowing, but that I guess isn't considered as.

[bubble transition]

PC Interviewer: Okay Pat, your second job of choice was the Phone Manger, but your records shows that you just ain't builded for the job [under breath] and we don't want to reuse a funny joke from a great show. So the third and final job that we’re going to see if you are the one for it! It is the Deliver Man!

Patrick: Wait? There is a pizza delivery service for Pizza Castle?!?

PC Interviewer: Well, yes. [under breath] Stupid.

Patrick: Pickled fish lips!

PC Interviewer: Now, do you know how a pizza delivery works?

Patrick: Ummmm... Wait, how does it work?

[The interviewer faceplams]

PC Interviewer: Okay, so first go to the address of the place you are given to-

Patrick: Wait!? What is an address!?!? How to you "go!??!?!?"

[The interviewer sighs]

PC Interviewer: So, first a "go" is how you... mmmm... how do I put it in a wa-

[Time Card: An Excruciatingly Tortuous Few Hours of Stupid Explanation Later...]

PC Interview: [tired] Okay... so you know that you don't eat the pizza while delivering the pizza to its customer?

Patrick: Yes!

[The employee sighs in relief]

PC Interviewer: Now with all of that explanation out of the way, now get on the road, here's the address and here's the key!

[Patrick goes out of the door]

PC Interviewer: Good luck!

''[Patrick goes starts up the boatmobile and starts drive. This creates a cloud of dust that covers up the screen, which is a transition to him on driving on the road. It after a bit becomes a pixel game and Patrick is seen hitting many pedestrians, cars and objects. He parks by swerving into a bus, which knocks it into the air and parks it where the bus once was. Patrick then gets out of the car and the bus lands besides the car. He starts to walk. Patrick is shown to be invincible as while is on the sidewalk, anything that touches him explodes and when he is on the road, any car that hits him gets destroyed while he is unscratched. After a bit of walking, he stops and brings out a piece of paper.]''

Patrick: Mmmmmmm... 38 Time Street...

[Pat sees a sign in a frontyard of a house that say "This is 38 Time Street."]

Patrick: Oh! Thanks sign!

''[While Patrick is going to the door, a pair of binoculars pop out of a bush. They are revealed to be that of the interviewer guy. He is taking notes and looking out of the binoculars.]''

PC Interviewer: [taking notes, but he then sees Patrick going up the steps to the door] Oh boy! This is going to be the moment of truth!

Patrick: [he knocks on the door] Pizza! Pizza... uh... um... delivery!

[The door opens]

Women Fish: Yes?

Patrick: Pizza, here!

''[The Women takes the box and starts to slowly open the lid. The PC employee in the bush is very heavy sweating]''

Women Fish: Holy manatees! This pizza is perfect and untouched! Here’s the tip with the payment! I gonna enjoy this! Five stars! [shuts the door]

Patrick: Uh. I can't tell if this was an unexpected or lazily written scene.

[PC Interviewer jumps out of the bush]

PC Interviewer: Man! That was good work! I really thought you would eat the pizza.

Patrick: The thought the same thing, maybe the writers scrapped it in the rough storyboards.

PC Interviewer: Here is your check!

[Drops a dollar and two quarters]

Patrick: I thought people aren't paided while they are in training. Anyways, woah! That is a lot of money!

PC Interviewer: Yea. The minimum wage of New Kelp City in your hands is a lot. Anyways, you're hired! Come on Fridays in the morning until 10:00 PM to be paided tipped- I mean minimum wage!

Patrick: [starts running around] Yay! Yes! Yes! [suddenly stops] What about the tip I got?

PC Interviewer: Let me drive you home!

[bubble transition]

[PC Interviewer and Patrick are driving in the night]

PC Interviewer: -I heard the Krusty Krab was the biggest restaurant for a while in Bikini Bottom, but New Kelp and Bikini [little giggle] are known atleast by Kelpers to be rivals. But I don't believe that one bit! Anyways it is a honor to have an employee who has strong connections to the legendary fry cook there. Oh look! The Krusty Krab! [the car stops] ...it is still open?

[The Krusty Krab is shown with the 'Opened Forever']

Patrick: Yea. It was an improvement for me. When I lived back at Bikini Bottom lived 400 yards away from the Krusty Krab and only a few from SpongeBob, the Krusty Krab became opened forever, 24/7, holidays, no break. That was for me! I remember that time when I went to it at 2 AM, also the time at 4 AM, and I can't forget that time at 3 AM! Everyone at the Krusty Krab were sleeping!

PC Interview: Well get off! I got to get sleep to! Man it is a great time being a shift manager!

Patrick: Thanks!

[He drives away]

Patrick: Huh. I never knew his name. Well, those Krabby Patties aren't going to be eaten by the air!

[Patrick goes into the Krusty Krab and the episode ends]