Captured Sponge

Captured Sponge is the fifth episode of Lost in Kelp Forest, and the fifth episode in season 1.

Synopsis
SpongeBob gets captured by a giant eagle that wants to feed it to its babies.

Transcript
(Squidward is playing on a wooden clarinet, and SpongeBob and Patrick are gathering more wood for their wooden Chum Bucket)

Patrick: Phew! This is a lot of hard work. Is it even worth it?

SpongeBob: Trust me, it’s worth it. (They hull the last pieces of wood onto the wooden Chum Bucket) We did it… Patrick: Woo…. (they both fall to the floor and pass out)

Squidward: Fools. They don’t know what hard work really is. (continues playing on his wooden clarinet. A hawk screeches in the distance) Oh, there’s hawks around here. Great...

(SpongeBob and Patrick stand up, sweeping the dust off their clothes)

SpongeBob: Two dozen chum burgers comin’ up!

Patrick: Yum.

(They go inside the wooden Chum Bucket. The hawk from earlier hears their laughing and comes to investigate. SpongeBob is cooking clams on the stove. When they’re done, he puts each of them in between two sandy buns)

Patrick: That looks heavenly! (licks his lips)

SpongeBob: I’ll be right back. Gotta go to the little sponge’s room.

(He walks outside, not knowing that a hawk was ready to snatch him. SpongeBob barely takes three steps outside when the hawk snatches him with its claws)

SpongeBob: (screaming) Let me go! Let me go! Please, pleeaassee!!!

Squidward: What’s going on?! (looks up to see the hawk with SpongeBob) AAAHHHHH! They’re attacking us! (starts running around in circles) Okay, Squidward, don’t panic. There’s always a solution.

Patrick: (now outside with a full stomach) What’s going on- OH DEAR NEPTUNE! That hawk has got my buddy! I’ll save you! Eventually!

(SpongeBob is now far away, just barely able to be heard by the others)

SpongeBob: IF I DIE, KEEP THE KRABBY PATTY LEGACY GOING!

Patrick: OKAY! But I don’t even know how to cook… Oh… SpongeBob’s gonna die for sure.

Squidward: Yeah, but at least it isn’t me.

Patrick: Yeah. We need to get SpongeBob back!

Squidward: Wait, we? I’m not coming.

Patrick: Why not?

Squidward: I’m in pain. (fakes back pain) Oww, my back!

Patrick: Ok, okay, you can stay here. I’ll go rescue the sponge.

Squidward: Sounds good to me. (Patrick runs toward the eagle. Squidward giggles as he leaves) I’ll have the whole day to myself.

(Cut to Patrick running deep into the forest. He gets tired and starts walking, then stops and looks ahead)

Patrick: Ugh, (hollering) I’ll save you, SpongeBob! Eventually…. (pants and starts walking)

(Cut to Squidward eating a dead roach sandwich)

Squidward: Ah, pure protein. But not the best tasting kind. (spits out a fly) Well, it’s not so bad. At least Patrick isn’t here screaming like a wolf as usual.

(Suddenly, a sea spider jumps out of the woods, startling Squidward)

Squidward: Uhh, stay back, stay back…

(The sea spider leaps at Squidward and starts tugging at its face with its mouth)

Squidward: Get this thing off me! Ahh! (falls to the ground, and the sea spider starts biting his nose) Oh, great… Ow! (Cut back to SpongeBob caught by the random hawk. The hawk is halfway to its nest.)

SpongeBob: Let me go, now!

(the hawk squawks)

SpongeBob: Fine, have it your way. (he pulls out a bubble blower and bubble soap) Bubbles solve everything! (He takes a deep breath, and the bubbles go right into the hawk’s eyes. It starts flailing it wings, but it manages to safely land into its nest.)

SpongeBob: (snaps fingers) Dang it.

(SpongeBob is now in the middle of the giant hawk nest. The baby hawks inside of said nest start licking their lips)

SpongeBob: Nice lil’ hawks. Nice hawkies. (He prepares for his escape. Just when one of the babies start pecking at his head, SpongeBob darts out of the nest, falling all the way to the ground, and sprints the heck out of there. A few moments later, he slows down, then stops, and wipes his forehead)

SpongeBob: Phew. That was a close one. I could’ve lost to a baby. (giggles) Like that’ll ever happen. (groans and passes out cold)

(Pans to the baby hawks, obviously angry that they didn’t get their dessert)

Adult Hawk: (squawks) Translation: I’ll get payback one day…. One day….

(Cut to Squidward and Patrick playing Super Mario Party on Patrick’s Switch)

Patrick: Woo-hoo! I got first place!

Squidward: Relax, buffoon, it’s just one mini-game, we still got 300 more to get through.

Patrick: True. But I beat you! (laughs)

Squidward: You do realize that’s the first mini-game you won, and we’re 50 games in.

Patrick: Oh. (slumps down into his sand chair) I miss SpongeCake.

Squidward: It’s SpongeBob.

Patrick: Whatever.

Squidward: At this point we need any chance of survival we can get, and SpongeBob’s our main source.

Patrick: I guess. But how are we gonna get him back? He might be dead by now.

Squidward: Dingus, he’s a sponge. He can’t die from that.

Patrick: You don’t know what he’s like.

(They both slump further down in their chairs)

(Cut to Mr. Krabs and Pearl reading old battered books, when suddenly their whole house is taken away by two random guys)

Mr. Krabs: What the what is happenin’?!

Pearl: Our house is being taken away!

Mr. Krabs: Oh...

Pearl: Maybe if you weren’t so cheap we wouldn’t be in this rut!

Mr. Krabs: I guess this is why they always warn me about being cheap…. Things like this.

Pearl: (starts sobbing quietly, and Mr. Krabs comes to hug her) I hope we won’t end up homeless.

Mr. Krabs: I doubt it’ll be like that forever, but yes, we will be homeless for now.

Pearl: Oh dear Neptune...

(Episode fades to black, signaling its end)