The Kelp/Issue IV

Introduction
Welcome all to a brand new edition of The Kelp! It's finally here after all that waiting for you to read written by your new owner and editor IRmjii!. There will be gossip, sport, and tons of other stuff waiting. Let's dive in! Another pointless comment given out by IRmjii 20:54, February 11, 2015 (UTC)

News!
SuperFanon'D has finally unmasked the mystery? Frequent editor SuperFanon'D who has being keeping most of his life a secret has now finally spilled the beans abuot himself! Users are shocked (And some think he is a fraud) to find the truth behind Former A Day With SpongeBob SquarePants worker and Patrick's Funtastic Life owner! In an exclusive interview we managed to get with the users he said this to us.

"You know all my life i have keeping it a secret and acting like nothing is happenening which is good enough for it to work. You see i have been conducting an experiment to see what it would someone's reaction or a community's reaction would be if i duisguised myself as a 13 - 15 year old user. I created 2 accounts called Squidward Tentacles and Sandra Cheeks which both were a good start but i wanted to make this more real. So after a while i ditched the accounts and created SuperFanon'D! It was working until recently when i decided to end the experiment and calculate the results. I was pretty satsified with them. So in conclusion this was all a setup. But for the right reasons. - SuperFanon'D!

So is he really what he is or is a thin white lie? Find out in the next issue,

Cosmobo= Hero or Villan?
Editor Cosmobo who was banned in April due to claims that he was underadged which made him absent for over 4 months (Luckly though he has migrated to ESB) has returned back from the dead but only to be find he is going to be banned again? Why do people say? Well according to a blog post written by fellow User SuperFanon'D! Because apparently he disrespected SBCA Family and Friends. The blog was written so that public votes could determine if he is innocent or not. We just manage to catch Cosmobo in time to have a quick interview, This is what he responded.

"I don't know why i was banned. I am a very nice user and well deserving of the community. When i was chatting to SBCA I didn't know what i said was wrong and thought he was mean to me. But if it did offend anyone then i'm sure i would not do it in harm and only by accident. Sorry for anyone who was offended - Cosmobo

In the recent updates. Cosmobo was not banned and was actually supported by the fellow community on this wiki. He is now editing as normal.

Ghastlyop in America
First up, Happy Birthday to you! And now, it's time to give you guys the EXCLUSIVE interview with, who has just been to the USA.

Reporter: How would you describe your trip?

Ghastlyop: Stressful because of the virus but overall, it was a good trip indeed.

Reporter: You have also noted that you have watched the SpongeBob Movie 2: Sponge Out Of Water, am I right?

Ghastlyop: Yes I did, three times in fact.

Reporter: Well then, how would you rate it?

Ghastlyop: It's a good movie. So I would give it 7/10.

Reporter: So, after your vacay, what do you plan to do?

Ghastlyop: I'll be continuing Sponge Reaper, of course. And I'll also be back for The Kelp!

Reporter: That's great, hope to see you back in action real soon!

Tune Up Your Week!
Now it's time for the first ever edition of, Tune Up Your Week on The Kelp with your host, Luis! This week's topic is...Top 3 Newest Episodes of Spin-Offs!

Basket Sponge: Substitute Coach
No Patrick. Not substitute couch. Don't be that dumb.

Anyway, this episode is REALLY hillarious. SpongeBob, as usual, sucks at boating. During his test, he runs over Coach LeBron. Now because of that incident, Kobe's gonna coach this heck of a team! To their suprise, they go on a FIVE GAME WIN STREAK. Really great, isn't it? Check out that episode here: Substitute Coach 

War of the Cities: The Beginning of the End
Wait, it hasn't aired yet. Aww. Well, this episode seems thrilling, but it just hasn't aired yet. But we'll be sure to put this on the list when it does!

Leader Plankton: Time Traveling Mess
This episode's great! Time traveling, mess, oh. Loljk. This episode's a good one because it has the thrill of time travel and the peril of disaster. A great plotline to a great story. Check out the episode here: Time Traveling Mess  

Rags to Riches: Two Unlikely Friends
Baby cussing? Nah, it's 6-year-old cussing. :P

Anyway, yeah. There are minor cussing but this episode has that comedy of a usual spin-off episdoe. Won't rate it that high but it sure will give you a good laugh! Check out the episode here: Two Unlikely Friends

'''That's all for this edition of Tune Up Your Week! Be sure to check out the next issue, next week. Want to be part of this lineup? Make a good episode that I'll enjoy, you might get a chance to be here! See you all next time, goooodbyyyyeeee!'''

Title Card Of The Week.


Title card by WumboMan900

Jokes
Q: Why coudn't the wizzard stop moving?

A: He likes "Wander" a bit.

Q: What do you call a wig that likes to get changed?

A: A Hairdresser!

Q: Why did the girl threw water at the computer?

A: To put out a flame war!

Q: How do nut's like to describe cheese biscuits?

A: They're a bit "Crackers"

Riddle Of The Day
I am trapped in a steel metal box with no doors or windows. The only thing infront of the me is a table. How can i escape?

Anagrams:
1. Het Lkpe

2. Psqaerpnt Sbboogneua

3. Ttbbk Ryaypa

4. Miis Ndaa Brjci

5. Obktsge Bpnae

Missing Letters:
1. E_ _s_ d_e

2. W_k_ _

3. E_g_ _e  _r_ _s

4. L_ _E  _ _  A  _on_ _

5. T_ _  S_ _e_  _f  J_ _ d _ _

Basket Sponge
Basket Sponge is a Spin Off collabroated by 3 people. Doctor Bugs, and SBCA. It focuses on a basketball team called the Bikini Bottom Bulldogs who work with USA basketball player LeBron James who helps them train them well in time for the champinonship

Now let me start of by saying that i was hoping for someone to do something like the one above (Before the show started production) And now i have finally got what i was wanting. This Spin Off is not only creative but it really packs a lot into each episode. Every joke is carefully thought out and written to make them laugh and chuckle as well as give them that feeling of suspense into it. I applaud them for that as that was done well. All the jokes fit well into the plot as well as each episode. If you love basketball and SpongeBob then i don't want to keep you waiting. Go check it out. It's totally worth looking at. - IRmjii

Click here to read this Spin Off:

Basket Sponge

Weather
To finish off the newspaper here are the listings for the weather for USA, UK and Philippines for tommorrow. These are actual real listings.

USA:

Tommorrow you might be for a chilly start as it will be mostly rainy and snowy in some parts of America. In New York the temperatures will drop down to a freezing -1 degrees. So don't forget to wrap up warm.

UK:

If you live in the UK then you will be in luck. While it won't be sunny there will be loads of cloudy skies and a few patches of sun here and their. The temperatures will a mild 8 degrees especially in Yorkshire and other parts of England. A bit cold but bareable enough. I would advise wearing a Jacket.

Philippines:

If you are in the Philippines then you are going to witness some scorching temperatures up to 29 degrees. It will be very warm with lots of cloud and sun shining in your area. Especially in Manillia as that will be very hot so it's time to put on your swim gear head to the beach!

Final Message
And so that concludes today's paper. This has been IR signing off with a goodbye from me. I hope you enjoyed the paper and i shall see you in the next issue! Good bye! Another pointless comment given out by User:IRmjii 20:54, February 11, 2015 (UTC)