Absorbent Magazine Issue 3

Introduction
Hey guys what's up?!. Welcome to Absorbent Magazine!. The magazine where you hear all about SBFW and SpongeBob SquarePants. And in this issue, we have a lot to speak about. So let's get started.

Channel Chasers is Featured
Channel Chasers is now featured on the front page of SBFW. I have not said this yet, but Channel Chasers actually started of as a project. Me and Doctor Bugs helped each other create some plot lines. I never knew it would become this popular though. I asked a person last night on chat and they knew exactly what Channel Chasers was. Not naming names but this happened.

Do you read Channel Chasers?

No

We have a huge fanbase!. But seriously. Thanks for the help. I will give a little shout out to Doctor Bugs, Wumboman, Luis for his amazing episode. Adam for his new episode. It has not aired yet. But this is great.

Luis is Gone!!!
Luis has left SBFW. For good. He has left Rags to Riches to another user. We will all wish him luck. We will miss him. Here are some of Luis's best moments.

Rags to Riches:

Customer: (bites) You know, this is actually delicious! What's in it?

Eugene: Patties I bought from the supermarket and.....wait, pay the 3 bucks first.

Customer: (hands over the bills) Here. How about the ingredients?

Eugene: Clam poop and a used bra.

[The customer vomits on the Plab Patty.]

Sheldon: Hey, I'm back. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED OVER HERE?

Basket Sponge:

Ron: I’ll tweet something right now.

Anti-Bikini Bottom Bulldogs

One secret the Bulldogs have been keeping: Larry knocks some players unconscious at their practices.

Flatts: Is that so? Man, I’ve been FOOLED to ever like the Bulldogs!

Ron: Hey, we got a follower!

Rob: I knew we would have. And if we keep saying bad things about The Bikini Bottom Bulldogs we’re sure to end up with more fans than they have. It’s the perfect crime.

Ron: Let’s keep doing this.

Luis has been really helpful to the community too. He added a clock. He was always nice. WISH YOU WELL LUIS.

Time Travelling SpongeBob
I haven't had time to read this yet. But it's a new spin-off named Time Travellers. It looks great. I suggest you check it out. It's a SpongeBob and Doctor Who crossover. I personally don't like Doctor Who that much. But this looks good. So, I will get round to reading it. Also, even though I don't like or watch Doctor Who. I still know many facts about it. So I suggest you read. I hope Adam isn't offended because I said I don't like Doctor Who that much.

Comic Script
Channel Chasers in....Jurassic Park? Are You Sure?

[Scene starts with SpongeBob and Friends in a café]

SpongeBob: So, what are ya gonna get to eat today?

Patrick: Ice cream!

Squidward: Why do you need to know? Nothing great is going to happen when I get a yogurt.

[Squidward goes up to the counter and orders a yogurt]

[Squidward puts it onto the table]

SpongeBob: Squid, you've got a ticket on your yogurt. And it says it's a free trip to Jurassic Park!

Squidward: Are you serious? You know how Jurassic Park films end.

SpongeBob: But this is gonna be good!

[Scene cuts to SpongeBob behind a tour car and it is raining]

[A T-Rex is behind the tour car as well]

SpongeBob: Well, I was wrong!

WILL SpongeBob AND FRIENDS SURVIVE THEY'RE TRIP TO JURASSIC PARK? FIND OUT IN THE NEXT ISSUE OF ABSORBENT MAGAZINE!

Movie Reviews
This section has nothing to do with SpongeBob. But I just want to point out that this is a terrible film I'm reviewing. It's the worst film ever. So what film could this be? birdemic: Shock and Terror.

The film is so boring. The acting is boring. The plot is average. And the script and sound are awful. The sound is awful. And there are so many mistakes. The plot is about birds attacking. That go into buildings and explode. THAT IS AWESOME! Well I timed the film. It took 42 minutes for the birds to appear. And what do these birds look like? TERRIBLE CGI! I could do better on the Toontastic app. It's horrible. The acting is awful. All the birds do are fly in front of people. And somehow that kills people. Because why not? IT IS AWFUL! There's multiple scenes where you feel like falling asleep. Wait, here's the first line from the film. Rod: Hi. Nathalie: Hi. Nathalie: Here's the menu. Rod: Thank you. Wow... Dr. Jones: It's the human species that needs to quit playing cowboy with nature. We must act more like astronauts, spacemen taking care of Spaceship Earth.

Next week. Humans Vs Zombies in...Humans Vs Zombies -_-

Top 10 SBFW News of the week
SBFW is great. And there's lots of news about it. And this fits all that news into 1, or 10 :P

10.

The magazine has been published. Absorbent Magazine 3.

9. YouTube Crossers is in production.

8. Spike's birthday. Happy B-Day.

7. Channel Chasers is featured.

6. Basket Sponge has a theme song now.

5. Wumbo man is found in his account WumboCombo.

4. Time Travellers airs.

3. Ghostbusters crossover is being written.

2. Basket Sponge and Channel Chasers crossover might be on its way to SBFW.

1. This wiki is awesome