Control Freak

Control Freak is the eighth episode of the first season of Better Days, and the 8th overall.

Plot
A creepy old man is transferred to the Kelp City Retirement Complex, and he takes over as the new boss!

Transcript
(The camera shows the old retirement home in its old glory. An elderly man is seen walking to the entrance. He opens the door, and immediately heads to the boss’s office, who is Mr. Richards.)

Mr. Richards: What do you think you’re doing he- whoa!

(The unknown man throws the boss out of the window. The lady at the counter rushes over to the boss’s office to see a creepy old man in his place.)

Lady: How dare you throw the boss out the window! That’s it, go sit in the punishment room for the rest of the week!

Man: But I don’t even-

Lady: Now!

(The man sadly limps over into the punishment room next to the elderlies’ rooms. He sits in one of the only chairs in there and waits two weeks. After the two weeks, the lobby lady opens the door.)

Lady: Alright, you can come out now. But we’re watching you.

(The man goes over to room 108, the only vacant room on the floor. He lies down on the sofa and ponders.)

Man (thinking): How should I go around to doing this? They said they’re watching me, but I’ll take care of that easy peasy. But how will I take over without getting caught? Doing it gradually, of course! (laughs inside head because logic) Delightfully devilish, Simon!

(He decides to wait until midnight. When midnight arrives, the man tiptoes into the office and pulls out a green crayon from his pocket. He grabs the rule book laying on the table and opens it. He writes down next to a rule that says “No one may ever take the boss’s place without proper consent” a new sub-rule that says “Unless that person is over the age of 65”. He goes back into his room and goes to sleep on the sofa. The next morning, the man goes into the boss’s office again and throws Mr. Richards out the window again. One again, the lobby lady comes in and scolds the man.)

Lady: How dare you do that again!

Man (grabs rule book): According to this book, I can do that since I’m over the age of 65.

The lobby lady looks at the green crayon writing. Surprisingly, she believes it’s actually part of the rules.

Lady: Oh, okay. Sorry to bother you.

(She leaves the room to go back to her job. The old man sits in the old boss’s chair, doing… something. A title card shows up that says, “Two hours later”. Two hours later, Muriel appears in the office.)

Muriel: I would like to file a complaint!

Man: What’s your complaint, ma’am?

Muriel: These new rules are ridiculous.

(She pulls out a copy of the rule book from her pocket, and opens it up on the table.)

Muriel: This rule here. “Curfew is at six o’clock, except on weekends, which is six thirty.” What kind of rule is this?!

Man: See, ma’am, there’s a good reason for this. Old people are-

Muriel: Blah, blah, blah. You’re not like the old boss at all! In fact, you’re the opposite of him! That’s it, I’m moving into another retirement home.

Man: Lady, please-

Muriel exits the building.

Man (thinking): Looks like that woman didn’t like my new rules. That’s just one, though. There’s about thirty other elderly folks in this building. She doesn’t matter.

A couple hours later, Adam pops into the office.

Adam: I’d like to file a… erm, complaint.

Man: What’s your complaint?

Adam: Well, the new rules are stupid. All of them.

Man: All of them, you say?

Adam: Yes, all of them. The curfew, the cars, the food, the everything. It’s like that one episode from The Loud House!

Man: Well, sir, you’re just not used to the new rules yet. Give them some time, and-

Adam: I’ve had enough of these rules. I’m outta here!

Man: No, wait!

(Adam exits the building in the same way that Muriel did. Soon enough, a complaint appears every five minutes. It puts so much stress on the man that he decides to enforce the rules even more. No complaints allowed, no eating after curfew, etc., etc. Since the elderly couldn’t complain, they call the police the next day. Less than an hour later, a police car parks in front of the retirement home. The policeman steps out of the car and goes inside into the unknown man’s office.)

Policeman: You’re under arrest throwing someone out the window and then taking that person’s job and have everyone complain and stuff.

Man: Ooookay?

The policeman puts handcuffs on the man and puts him in the back of his police car.

Man: But I didn’t do anything wrong!

Policeman: Yeah, yeah, tell it to the judge, greenie.

(The man’s name is revealed to be Simon “Stinky” Jeans. He is found guilty and sentenced to a year in prison. Back at the retirement home, the old boss is back.)

Mr. Krabs: We’re glad you’re back, Mr. Richards.

Mr. Shicowa: That old boss was pretty strange.

Mr. Richards: I’m glad I’m back, too.

The three of them laugh as the scene fades to black.

Appearances

 * Eugene Krabs
 * Mark Shicowa
 * Mr. Richards
 * Adam Fishman
 * Eustace Wendell (cameo)
 * Walter Ben (cameo)
 * Dave Finnigan (cameo)
 * Muriel Hannah
 * Simon "Stinky" Jeans (debut)
 * Nurse / Lady (debut)
 * Policeman (debut)

Trivia

 * The character taking over the retirement home is a parody of Jasbre.
 * This was the second episode of the series completed (first was Old Bounds, then after was 'Cuz We're Movin' on Up)
 * In that order, this is the first episode by FireMatch, solo-written. In production/airing order though, this is the 2nd solo-written.
 * The ratings for the original airing of this episode were 7.32 million viewers.