By Any Other Name

By Any Other Name (or Never Mind The Presidents) is the sixth televised episode of Spaced Out. It first aired on May 10th 2017.

Plot
After the last episode, Sandy and Squidward start a releationship? SpongeBob and Aiden have some fun and a special guest with his son want to kill the duo whilst eating a minority product.

Transcript
[The episode begins as Lilly and Aiden exit out of the Tardis with Aiden having a shirt and jacket.]

SpongeBob: Nice jacket... Patrick. Also, saw the end of the electricty.

Aiden: Thanks... we're done now. But what about the others?

[Back at the hold. Squidward and Sandy wake up.]

Squidward: What the hell was that?

Sandy: I don't know, Squidward... we must have passed out.

Squidward: Oh yeah... there's the bottle... by Plankon.

[Plankton's completely passed out.]

Sandy: Yeah. Doesn't it seem so good when no-one else is here?

Squidward: I know... with SpongeBob and that guy gone, I think we can finally have a moment's peace by ourselves.

[They look around as they start to snog together.]

[Meanwhile.]

SpongeBob: Sometime's it's so boring up here.

Aiden: We're going to need to do something in the while before Cardiff. How long's that, by the way...?

SpongeBob: We'll be there in 6 hours.

Aiden: 6 hours… Damn… that’s a long time.

SpongeBob: Yeah…

[After their kiss. Sandy and Squidward stop.]

Sandy: That was…

Squidward: Great.

Sandy: Leave it til later…

Plankton (slowly waking up): Is Trump gone?

Squidward: Not for another 4 years, Plankton…

Plankton: Damn it, I thought I was dreaming about a future where Bernie Sanders is President of the US.

Doctor (calling from upstairs): He does.

Plankton: Really?

[The Doctor comes into the room.]

Doctor: He wins the next election against Kanye West.

Plankton: I thought that was just a cruel joke.

Doctor: That’s what everyone thinks.

Plankton: Tell me more…

Doctor: Alright then.

[They both leave the room. Leaving Sandy and Squidward alone.]

Sandy: So, erm… Wanna go back to what we were doing again?

Squidward: Yeah, sure.

[In the control room. SpongeBob sees the Doctor with Plankton.]

SpongeBob: Why did you bring him here?

Doctor: He wanted to know about the US 2020 Presidential Election.

SpongeBob: Trump wins again?

Doctor: Nope… Bernie.

SpongeBob: Really?

Doctor: 100% positive. The world’s a better place without the horrors of Trump.

[Everyone laughs as a CCTV camera looks at them all as D. Trump watches them in ‘The White House’ – now trademarked by the Trump Jr. Corporation.]

Trump: They’ll want a war…. Bernie’s not getting the crown this time.

Trump Jr: Will you shut the hell up, Dad? Bernie’s yours anyways. You overrule him… until 2020.

Trump: That’s what I don’t’ want, son. I want a future… a non-Mexican future.

Trump Jr: Why you saying that with a burrito in your hands?

Trump: I killed a guy to get it.

Trump Jr: He was from here… wasn’t he?

Trump: Yeah…

Trump Jr: I’m just gonna leave before this turns into Watergate.

[Trump fires the missiles into the sky.]

Guy: Wow… look at that… he’s finally blowing up Mexico.

[A tramp starts speaking in Hebrew.]

[The missile reaches space… so far away, is the ship that they are piloting.]

SpongeBob: What’s that heading towards us from Earth?

Aiden: Looks like a…

SpongeBob: Missile! It’s from Trump!

Aiden: How… would he know?

[They look round to see the CCTV.]

SpongeBob: He’s hacked into the recording of the CCTV camera… which was set up for no reason.

Aiden: Oh… I forgot to tell you, you know who the ship used to belong to?

SpongeBob: You never told me who.

Aiden: It was Donald Trump.

SpongeBob: WHAT?! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?! HOW WOULD YOU DO THAT?!

Aiden: It was easy… I got a plane to Washington of D.C and in the middle of the night, I stole the ship.

SpongeBob: He would probably have noticed it was gone.

Aiden: Considers the swearing I heard from a man. Didn’t know it was him?

SpongeBob: How could you… oh yeah, you don’t have internet. But wait a minute… you should have seen the election polls.

Aiden: The only other news channel on my TV is FOX NEWS.

SpongeBob: Yeah… I’m not gonna trust them either.

[The scene pauses to show a moving header board saying, “SpongeBob SquarePants and Nickelodeon and The TIG are untrue to their word of their opinion of… FOX NEWS. Wait a minute, I don’t even watch that news channel, it’s fake… and… oh yeah. Give me a second to get the thing back up.”.]

Aiden: Plus I think I had too much to drink that night. Still though Hillary won.

SpongeBob: Lesser of two evils…

Aiden: Words to live by.

SpongeBob: Anyways, what about the missile?

[The missile stops, as he is able to get the ship out of his way.]

SpongeBob: Oh yeah.

Aiden: Now, that was cool… and situational.

SpongeBob: Mind, if it was Bush. He’d throw too much at us.

Aiden: I don’t think Bush really cares about us.

SpongeBob: Obama approved of us… that was great.

Aiden: Who’s he again?

SpongeBob: He was the one after Bush and before Trump…

Aiden: Never knew him. Must have been a nice guy if he respected us all.

SpongeBob: Mind, he could have been the exact opposite however.

[The camera then zooms out to the front of the ship and then to the back where we see that it is burning it’s way back to Earth on it’s search to Cardiff.]

French Narrator: And that was the end of that story…

[The SpongeBob SquarePants credits begin when a record scratch sound interrupts it.]

The Imperial Ghost: Wait a second… we’re not ending it that way. What about Sandy and Squidward? Everyone wants to know about them.

Jasbre202: No-one cares, Adam. You didn’t even get best spin-off at my own awards…

The Imperial Ghost: Shut up, you nominated YOUR own shows… you rigged the polls just like the 2016 Pres Election and Brexit.

Travis: Bernie should have still been pres.

The Imperial Ghost: Doesn’t matter, does it?! It’s a different country.

Jasbre202: What about Thresa May?

The Imperial Ghost: Who cares about Thresa May. By the time this comes out, there’s going to be another General Election because she can do whatever the hell she wants. Wait a minute, the episode’s still going on? DAMN IT!

[He stops the recording and ends the episode.]

Trivia

 * The episode is known by two names, By Any Other Name and Never Mind the Presidents. The official is By Any but the unofficial but better is Never Mind.