Livin' With the Squid (LIBB episode)

 ''This article is about the Life in Bikini Bottom episode. For the series, see Livin' With The Squid.''

"Livin' With the Squid" is a Season 2 episode of Life in Bikini Bottom. It is rated TV-14-LV and C.

Characters
NOTE: List is incomplete.
 * Sully the Squid
 * SpongeCock SquarePants
 * Fatrick Star
 * Security Guards
 * SpongeBob SquarePants (Livin' With the Squid)
 * Squidward Tentacles (Livin' With the Squid)
 * Patrick Star (Livin' With the Squid)
 * Fricky SquarePants
 * Gory the Snail

Synopsis
When SpongeCock asks Fatrick to buy some beer, he steals a pet squid that has similar interests as SpongeCock.

Plot
SpongeCock is watching an episode of The Terrible Travis’ spin-off, Livin’ With The Squid. Squidward is seen drinking can after can of Red Mist, while Patrick and SpongeBob are being damn fools, in the show. “Why the hell did Travis pack all of these episodes into one and only one season?” SpongeCock questions. However, Fatrick comes in and sits on SpongeCock. “Travis’ spin-offs are awesome! My favorite episode of this show is ‘Back To Hell (Not The Fanon Wiki).’ SpongeCock slips under and criticizes Fatrick for doing this crap. “Come on...I need to find a way to watch this in peace.” He thinks of babysitting Fatrick, but that was already done last episode. He soon gives up and goes to get an ice cold beer out of the fridge. But soon, he realizes that there are none left! “Fatrick, did yo-,” SpongeCock starts, but it then cuts to Fatrick, who is excessively drunk. SpongeCock growls in anger and jumps on Fatrick, trying to tear him apart. “Calm down, calm down, yellow freak!” Fatrick yells. “Now, what do you want?” “You drank all of my beer! So now, you’re gonna go to the store and get me some!” SpongeCock is seen pushing him outside, but is not making any progress. “Now go!” “But I don’t have any money!” “Fine, fine, here’s 50 bucks. Now go!” Fatrick waddles into his car, and is swerving and knocking things over on the street. “I know he’s drunk, but how can he screw up this time?”

Our whole universe was in a G and PG state

Then nearly fourteen billion years ago was inappropriate, wait

Fatrick shit a stool, Shitward began to drool

They invented crap that rules

We built a great, great wall (we started cursing)

Shit, titties bursting, unraveling the coercing

''This is Life in Bikini Bottom! PG-13!''

Fatrick is seen arriving at the store, where he is walking down the aisles. “Hmm….I can totally go for some beer,” he states, as he goes to the alcoholic beverage aisle. “Let’s see…..ice cream cake, cheesecake, ice cr- oops, that’s the dessert aisle ICE CREAM CAKE….eh, I can’t do it.” He moves to the next one down. “Champagne….wine...beer!” Fatrick finds. He then drinks all of it in the aisle, but gets cut to him being kicked out of the store. “Get out, and stay out!” the guard says. “Hmmm….I know!” Fatrick is in a Squidward costume now from Livin’ With The Squid. He goes in and finds the alcoholic beverages. He goes through the drinks all again, but this time, finds something amazing. “Ooh! Red mist!” he then grabs three six packs and goes to walk out. However, he sees a squid in an aisle, who is in a cage, who looks badass, with an eye patch and a clean condom. Sully also is wearing a backwards cap advertising weed, and a shirt labeled, “Never stop drinking beer Zorty!” But Fatrick thinks the Squid is an ice cream cake, and goes to get it. He waddles over, takes it out its cage, and goes to bite it. However, the Squid defends itself. “Greetings, fatass,” the squid says. “You can talk! Alright, go persuade them to give me free ice cream cake!” Fatrick demands, but the squid chooses not to. “I’m Sully. I’m actually pretty damn badass. Get me, bitch!,” he introduces himself, as Fatrick says “alright, ice cream cake!” Fatrick takes both Red Mist and Sully without without paying for them. “Hey, wait a minute! Get back here and pay for those!” the guard says right after noticing Fatrick and Sully making a run for it. “I wanted to anime masturb- oh wait, Ponyo is here.”

It then cuts to SpongeCock, who is now watching “Are,” an episode of ParodySponge. “Hm….Tyce+Travis: Naughty Boys in Bed...I wonder if that’s out so I can buy it…” SpongeCock wonders. “By the way, where’s Fatrick?” At that moment, there’s a knock on the door. SpongeCock goes to answer it, and sees that it’s Fatrick. “Your change, bitch!” Fatrick says while handing SpongeBob the $50 bucks. “Wow, that’s a large change. But never mind that, where’s my beer?” “Actually, I got you red mist.” “Great! I didn’t even know they had it in Bikini Bottom. But anyway, where is it?” Fatrick then scratches his head. “Oh, yeah….I….gave it to Sully.” “Who...who’s Sully?” Fatrick tells him the long-ass story, and brings Sully into the house. “Um...Fatrick? You gave this squid….all of my red mist?” “Well, ya know, Squidward is addicted to it, and he’s also a squid, so..” “SQUIDWARD’S AN OCTOPUS, YOU FRICKING MORON!” SpongeCock screams. “Well, SpongeCock, I wanted ice cream cake, and he looked like it, so…” he excuses. However, SpongeCock facepalms and looks up. “First of all, they look nothing alike. Second of all, you weren’t supposed to fricking get ice cream cake! You were supposed to get beer!” SpongeCock is understandably pissed and walks away.

Sully gets out of the cage and goes to their couch. He puts on his chain and starts to play Grand Theft Weed V by Cockstar Games. SpongeCock comes back in after being pissed, and he sees Sully play like a complete badass. “Wow...that game is awesome! Where did you get it?” “Well, I know all the jackpots in the store. Especially looking looking at my store manager’s computer history which had loads of hen ties!”

It then cuts to a flashback of Sully getting out of his cage and going to the video games aisle, getting a copy, and going back to his cage.

“Yep….” he confirms. SpongeCock goes to get some Pluto Vodka from “Prima Vodka” and goes to sit down on the couch with Sully. They continue to play the game like complete badasses and talking shit to the other players in the game. “Damn this game is fun. Ey whoever made this incredible vodka?” Sully asks SpongeCock. “I did, well it was on accident, but it made great profit. I’m glad you like it!” “I had a pretty tough life living in a cage. People tortured me, threw rocks at me, and it was this day that I…-” “Was rescued by an overweight starfish who thinks you are an icecream cone, I get it. Say, we make a really good team on Fish Death Match and Sexual Lobster Pinches. I’m glad that Fatrick discovered you.” SpongeCock points out. “Be right back I gotta go smoke some weed and watch some ‘Livin’ With Squid.’ Sully replies. “Wait a second you like ‘Livin With Squid’ and weed too? I just got weed that will grow you long, beautiful hair just like Travis!” SpongeCock yells excitedly about. “Wanna go try it out?” Sully questions. “Let’s do it!” Right when Sully and SpongeCock were about to grow long-ass Travtard hair using weed (LIBB Logic), loud knocking can be heard from the front door. Fatrick then approaches the door and says, “Look! The Po-po is here! Maybe they want some ice cream cake!” Right just then, the police knock over the door causing Fatrick to back-waddle all the way to the bathroom. “We are here for that blasted squid. Give him back or we will arrest you, that is an order!” a policeman with a shield yells. Before SpongeCock can hesitate, the policeman runs in and takes Sully, placing him in a cage. The policeman then runs back into his boat and drives away. “No… m-m-m-my friend. The only sea creature that I could connect with! Violated! What will I do?” Fatrick then walks back from the bathroom and says, “Well that was a waste of Red Mist. Oh well, I still have ice-cream cake.” SpongeCock then replies, “Oh Fatrick, you don’t understand. Wait a second…” Suddenly Fricky and Gory walk by playing with Fatrick’s mixtape. SpongeCock then walks up to Fricky and Gory and requests a favor. “Are you guys up for some REAL fun? What about sneaking into FrickMart, and stealing a squid by the name Sully tonight? Looks like the police aren’t getting away this time… oh and your rewards of course! Access to a VIP house with a pool included. No. Extra. Charge.” Fricky and Gory, in disbelief, nod their heads.

The episode then cuts to night time, where Gory and Fricky are dressed with a black ski mask and are on top of FrickMart. Fricky lowers a rope down a hatch and Gory takes it, silently sliding down. Once Gory lowers down to the ground, he appears to be in the Store Manager’s room where he is humping a pillow. Gory carefully backs away from the room silently and navigates the whole store. After finding many dildos and condoms, Gory finally finds Sully in his usual cage. Gory takes Sully’s cage, finds the rope, and climbs up it. An alarm suddenly goes off. “Stop that snail! He’s taking that squid!,” a guard yells. Gory goes into his shell and rolls it. “Come here, little mollusk,” a guard is saying while inching closer to Gory. However, Gory rolls with his shell and knocks the guard down, as he goes under a shelf for cover. He takes out a phone and dials SpongeCock. “Meow meow meow, meow, meow! MEWWW!!!!” SpongeCock is frightened, as he thinks Gory’s in trouble. He arrives at FrickMart and dives down the latch and grapples onto the edge of a wall with his fingers. The owner of the store is walking into the room, as SpongeCock gets down and punches him in the balls. “OWWWIIEEE!!” the owner shrieks, acting like a retarded 4 year old. SpongeCock takes cover under a shelf and gets his phone. He goes to an app and types in some random code. This code causes an explosion in the store out of his phone, and SpongeCock is immune to it due to a bomb-proof vest he has on.

Meanwhile, Gory is using his eyestalks to battle some of the employees. “We got a snail on the loose,” one says, “call for backup!” A guard shoots at Gary’s shell causing Gory to be wounded but SpongeCock suddenly jumps into the scene and swiftly sidekicks each guard who is attacking Gory causing them to roll across the floor. SpongeCock picks up the cage and holds Gary in his arms and successfully climbs the rope where he finds Fricky hiding in the boat SpongeCock brought when he drove to FrickMart. The Store Manager walks out and says, “Oh I am not going down without a fight!” Luckily, Sully squirts ink out of the boat causing the manager to be temporarily blinded. The gang drives away back to SpongeCock’s house where Sully thanks SpongeCock, Gory, and Fricky for rescuing him. The episode ends with Fatrick and Shitward in a shower eating ice cream cake. They then turn to the camera screen and say, “It’s not what it looks like!”

Trivia

 * The title is a reference to The Terrible Travis’ show, "Livin' With The Squid."
 * According to wordcounter.net, the plot is:
 * 1,803 words.
 * 10,081 characters.
 * 85 sentences.
 * 15 paragraphs.
 * 11th-12th grade reading level.
 * 6 minutes, 34 seconds reading time.
 * 10 minutes, 1 seconds speaking time.
 * "SpongeCock" is used more than any other word.