The Naked Bet (transcript)

(SpongeBob reads a diploma)
 * (we see Sandy putting up a picture of a girl wearing a bikini and grabbing a stool out.)
 * Sandy: There. It's all finished, I can't wait for SpongeBob to come over so I can give him a great lecture about bikinis. (ding-dong) Oh, dear, that must be him now. Oh, I'm so excited! (opens the door revealing SpongeBob) Howdy, SpongeBob. Come right in.
 * SpongeBob: (steps right in) Well, hi, Sandy. I'll guess you were expecting me.
 * Sandy: Yep. Now come on, we got a very important lecture to discuss. (transition, then we see SpongeBob sitting on the stool, abd Sabdy is at the front of the board.) Okay, SpongeBob. Now, bikinis are the most popular swimsuits in the world, right?
 * SpongeBob: Yeah, so?
 * Sandy: So, I know they're popular because they can expose the belly, the feet, and best of all....very sexy. I bet you like me wearing a bikini all the time, do you? (posing in front of him)
 * SpongeBob: So hang on, let me get this straight, you're betting me that I like you wearing a bikini?
 * Sandy: That's correct.
 * SpongeBob: But if I don't think I like you're bikini, you would have to continue making inventions.
 * Sandy: True, true.
 * SpongeBob: Well, that's terrible. But if I do like you wearing your bikini, I have to spend a whole week naked?
 * Sandy: You got that right. And here's an added bonus, when you do, I will spend my entire week without by suit on, but my bikini and air helmet.
 * SpongeBob: But why must I?
 * Sandy: Because Bikini Bottom changed the policy. Look.
 * SpongeBob: "I hear by delcare that SpongeBob's birthday suit is allowed, anytime, anywhere, and anyplace, except for the Krusty Krab. In short, SpongeBob's nudity is now legal?!" Wow! I can't believe it! You got a deal! (Sandy and SpongeBob shake hands, theb we transition to SpongeBob on a striptease set with Sandy, who's carrying a whistle)
 * Sandy: Okay, SpongeBob, here are the rules. But first, a little minor note; you shouldn't cover yourself up at all with anything.
 * SpongeBob: Not anything?
 * Sandy: Nope! Now, HERE are the rules. When I blow my whistle, you will throw your clothes on the ground. Then, my new machine, will send your clothes back to your pineapple house. You got that?
 * SpongeBob: Got it!
 * Sandy: Okay, ready?
 * SpongeBob: (desperate) I'm ready!
 * Sandy: Get set! (SpongeBob puts his hands to his pants, and in slow motion, Sandy takes a deep breath and blows on her whistle, thus, signalling SpongeBob to undress. SpongeBob removes all of his clothes and tosses them high up into the air landing on the grass, and Sandy operates her invetion just by pushing a button, making robotic hands appear carrying SpongeBob's clothes outside of the treedome) And away they go!
 * (the robotic hands place the clothes into SpongeBob's bedroom where Gary is and it exits)
 * Gary: Meow (which meant "What a mess!) (Gary places the clothes back into the closet, hanging on a hanger) Meow. (which meant "That's better") (Gary smiles with his teeth)
 * SpongeBob: (excited) Yes! I'm just as bare naked as a sea lion! By the way, are there any seals in Bikini Bottom besides Craig Mammalton?
 * Sandy: (checking out SpongeBob's body) Beats me. (puts on her helmet) Okay, SpongeBob, are you ready for your first assignment?
 * SpongeBob: You bet I am!
 * Sandy: Alright. Well, then, come along. (they go outside, and SpongeBob takes off his water helmet) You're first naked thing you'll do is get a naked tan on top of my treedome.
 * SpongeBob: All the way up there? But it's too high.
 * Sandy: Oh, no problem. I got my elevator shoes to get you up there.
 * SpongeBob: Oh thank Neptune.
 * Sandy: Now, let's put some sunscreen on you so you won't get sunburned. (Sandy puts sunscreen all over SpongeBob's naked body, and Sandy puts on her elevator shoes) Okay, sha'll we go up? (they go to the top of the treedome, where SpongeBob lands onto the top, and lies down on his bare bottom on the stainless glass)
 * SpongeBob: Thanks, Sandy.
 * Sandy: No problem. Now, let's get to tanning! Ready? Get set! (blows her whistle as SpongeBob lies bareback on the top of the treedome)
 * SpongeBob: Goodbye tanlines! Alright, sun. Give it all you got!
 * Sandy: (calling up) Have a nice tan, SpongeBob. I;ll just go ahead and get a nice tan myself. (grabs a chair, puts on sunscreen and lies down on the beach chair) I'll be down here if you need me.
 * SpongeBob (calling down) Okay!
 * Misty: (swims by with an air helmet) Wow. That is some naked Sponge getting a nice tan. Your so sexy!
 * SpongeBob: Thank you. I like your midriff, Misty!
 * Misty: Well, thank you. I always thought that myself. (Swims off)
 * Kim Possible (in her cheerleading outfit and air helmet) Who is naked? Who is bare? Who is the Sponge who got a bet that's rare? That's SpongeBob!
 * SpongeBob: I'm beginning to like this.
 * Sandy: What are you doing here, Kim?
 * Kim: I was practicing for my underwater cheerleading class, when I say your friend with that bombshell body lying down on top of your treedome.
 * Sandy: I see.
 * KIm: Speaking of pratice, I better get to class (swims off)
 * Sandy: Okay. See ya. (to camera) What is with these weird human cameos? Oh, well.
 * (time card)
 * Narrator: Two hours later.
 * Buttercup: (with binoculars) Hey, nice naked body, SpongeBob! (flies off)
 * SpongeBob: Thanks, Buttercup.
 * (Sandy's whistle blows)
 * Sandy: SpongeBob, you're tan is finished. I'll get you down with my elevator shoes! (goes up, grabs SpongeBob, and goes down, and looks at his tan!
 * Sandy: Holy cow, SpongeBob! You got massive tan! You have no tanlines now.
 * SpongeBob: Yep. What's my next assignment?
 * (transitions to Jellyfish Fields)
 * Sandy: Your next assignment is streaking across Jellyfish Fields. Do you have what it takes to be a streaker?
 * SpongeBob: Just watch me! (heads to the sign of Jellyfish Fields) Okay, Sandy, start me off!
 * Sandy: Okay! Ready? Get set! (blows whistle and SpongeBob streaks off)
 * SpongeBob: (as he streaks through the flowers in the fields) I'm streaking! I'm streaking! I'd never thought I'd say this but....this is awesome!
 * Sandy: Make sure you don't get stung, okay?
 * (time card)
 * Narrator: 20 minutes later...
 * SpongeBob (as he reaches to the end of Jellyfish Fields, pants) I did it! I made to the end of Jellyfish Fields without getting my privates stung. I am a dedicated streaker!
 * Sandy: (blowing her whistle) Okay, SpongeBob! After you take a breath, we'll move on to our next assignment.
 * SpongeBob: Thanks, Sandy. I need to breath (pants) Boy, am I exhausted.
 * Sandy: Boy, I'll be. You got plenty of exercise, didn't you?
 * SpongeBob: Why, yes I did.
 * (transitions to Goo Lagoon)
 * Sandy: Here we are, SpongeBob. Goo Lagoon. This is the perfect place for your third assignment.
 * SpongeBob: So, what do you want me to do? I am ready for anything!
 * Sandy: Why all you have to do is go skinny dipping! Some people swim in the nude and it's fun! Let's get to the water.
 * SpongeBob: I'm going to really enjoy this!
 * Sandy: Ready? Get set! (blows whistle)
 * SpongeBob: (as he runs down to the lagoon) Geronimo! (splashes into the lagoon) I feel so relaxed.
 * Sandy: (putting down her whistle and runs towards the water) Cannonball! (she jumps into the water and splashes water on SpongeBob as they both laugh) It's a great day for swimming!
 * SpongeBob: (as they continue splashing water on each other) Yeah, it is! *laughs* BIYEYEYE!
 * Beachgoer #1: Hey, look at that! That's SpongeBob!
 * Beachgoer #2: And he's skinnydipping with Sandy!
 * (beachgoers are amazed)
 * Beachgoers: Wow! (a seal named Megan spotted them)
 * Megan: Arf arf arf! Sandy and SpongeBob, they're just the people I need for my ball drop!
 * SpongeBob: (noticing Megan up ahead) Hey, Sandy, look at that seal up ahead.
 * Sandy: I guess there were some seals in Bikini Bottom besides Craig Mammalton after all.
 * Megan: (coming near the water) You bet there are. Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Megan the Seal. I come from Hawaii.
 * Sandy and SpongeBob: Hawaii?
 * Megan: Yeah. (SpongeBob and Sandy come out of the water to get near Megan, and Megan notices SpongeBob has no clothes on) Uh, why do you have no swimsuit on?
 * Sandy: Oh, SpongeBob and I had made a bet that if SpongeBob can be naked for a whole week, I can spend a whole week in Bikini Bottom without my suit on, but my bikini, and my helmet.
 * Megan: I see I see. Hey, I've been wanting to ask you a favor. I have been asked to be the ball drop of Bikini Bottom on New Year's Eve this week, and I was wondering if you could help me prepare for the big party this Friday.
 * Sandy: Okay, but what do you have to do for the ball drop?
 * Megan: Oh, that's simple. (grabs a beach ball) I toss a beach ball high up in the air, so it would fall. Just like in Time Square on the surface world. Do you want to see me balance a beach ball on my snout? I've been practicing.
 * Sandy: Sure, but can I signal you with my whistle, right here?
 * Megan: I don't mind.
 * Sandy: Okay. Ready? Get set (blows whistle as Megan puts the beach ball on her nose)
 * Megan: It takes a lot of practice and training. (she tosses the beach ball up and SpongeBob catches it)
 * Sandy: (blows whistle) Hey, that was a nice catch SpongeBob.
 * SpongeBob: I never thought I was this great at catching beach balls.
 * Megan: You know. This is where you come in, SpongeBob. Follow me, back into my cave. (they follow Megan, transitions to a sea lion's cave) This is where I live. I do a lot of exercises here. Now, SpongeBob, by 11:30 p.m. on New Year's Eve you will climb on my back and place the beach ball on my nose.
 * SpongeBob: (confused) Uhh, do I have to stay sitting on your back in the nude. Wouldn't be rather uncomfodtable having my bare bottom on your back while my sack dangles on it?
 * Megan: Oh, no I'm perfectly fine with it. I actually kinda like it *winks* You can get off after you put the ball on me.
 * SpongeBob: Yaaaay. Hey, wanna hear my impression of a seal.
 * Megan: Sure!
 * SpongeBob: (he stands on his hands and feet) Arf arf arf! (SpongeBob puts his feet up like a seal does) Arf!
 * Megan: (clapping her flippers) I love that impression!
 * SpongeBob: Thanks, I've been practicing myself for years. So when's New Year's Eve?
 * Megan: Tomorrow, Friday. Now go home and get some shut eye. Be here by tomorrow at 11:00 p.m., and be sure to take your squirrel friend along with you, okay?
 * SpongeBob: Gotcha.
 * (transition to outside of the cave)
 * SpongeBob: Phew, what a day. I guess I'm gonna be naked until New Year's Day.
 * Sandy: I gotta say. I'm impressed with you, SpongeBob. You are the best nudist in in all of Bikini Bottom.
 * SpongeBob: Thanks Sandy. I love your bikini also. Well, I better go home and take a shower. See you tomorrow!
 * Sandy: Good night, my sexy nude friend.
 * (Bikini Bottom News Logo appears)
 * Announcer: We interrupt this program to bring you an important news flash. Our regular news reporter, Perch Perkins is absent because he is on vacation in Tiki Land for the holiday week, so we take you now to human newsreporter, Tom Tucker for a special news report on SpongeBob's nudity.
 * Tom Tucker: Good evening, I'm Tom Tucker for Bikini Bottom News, and tonight, our top story is called "A Seal and Nudist Sponge" (title appears on screen) SpongeBob and Sandy made a bet a few days ago that he would go a day without clothes while Sandy goes around Bikini Bottom with just her swimsuit on, which apparently makes it a good deal since nudity in Bikini Bottom is legal. Let's go to Ollie Williams to see which spots are available for naked sponges. Ollie?
 * Ollie: SPONGEBOB'S HOUSE, GOO LAGOON, SANDY'S TREEDOME, AND MEGAN'S CAVE.
 * Tom Tucker: Thanks, Ollie. In other news, Megan, the new seal in Bikini Bottom has been hired by the mayor to be doing the ball drop on New Year's Eve and wants SpongeBob to supervise her. The New Year's Eve party is set to begin tomorrow on that day. We now return you to Bikini Bottom Football.
 * (static screen into football game)
 * Football Announcer: Reg has the ball at the top of the key! And they were all like, I'm open! I'm open!
 * (SpongeBob turns off the TV)
 * SpongeBob: Oh, boy. This is so exciting! I can't wait 'till tomorrow. (turns on the shower rods) I'll be so proud of Megan once she does her stunt!
 * (after the shower, SpongeBob comes out all wet and Gary has SpongeBob's clothes)
 * Gary: Meow? (which meant "SpongeBob?")
 * SpongeBob: Wow, Gary. You look awesome in those clothes!
 * Gary: Meow. (means "Please put some clothes on! You look perverted with your penis showing!")
 * SpongeBob: No, Gary. Not right now. I'm under Sandy's contract. Look. (Gary sneers at the contract)
 * Gary: Meow. (which menas "I give up.")
 * SpongeBob: Come on, Gary. We got a big day tomorrow night! Let's turn in.
 * Gary: Meow. (which meant "Oh boy..")
 * (the next day)
 * SpongeBobL (waking up) I'm awake! Good morning and Happy New Year, Gary!
 * Gary: Meow.
 * SpongeBob: I better get going. Sandy's expecting me again. See ya leter, Gary. (runs off) I'm ready! I'm ready!
 * (transition - SpongeBob stands on top of a cinderblock)
 * Sandy: Okay, SpongeBob. It's time to do some nude modeling. When I blow my whistle, you will pose in an embarrased way. In other words, trying to cover yourself.
 * SpongeBob: Yeah. Intriging.
 * Sandy: Yes. Ready? Get set! (blows whistle as SpongeBob covers his penis and scrotum) Now let's take a picture of you in this pose. (takes the shot) Good, very good. Now let's try lying down (blows whistle and SpongeBob lies down) Picture will be taken now. (after a couple of snapshots, the modeling session was over) Okay. On to our next assignment.
 * (transition, SpongeBob is on top of a diving board which lands in a kiddie pool)
 * Sandy: Time for you to dive off the diving board. Ready, SpongeBob?
 * SpongeBob: I'mm ready!
 * Sandy: Okay. Ready, get set! (blows whistle and SpongeBob dives off the diving board and lands into the water perfectly and SpongeBob raises his head in a Little Mermaid like fasion)
 * SpongeBob: I am so hot!
 * Sandy: You get a perfect score of 100%!
 * SpongeBob: Oh, great!
 * (time card)
 * Narrator: 11:00 p.m.
 * (SpongeBob looks for something in his toy chest)
 * SpongeBob: (finding a beach ball) This ball should be perfect. Come on, Gary.
 * Gary: Meow. (they walk off)
 * (transitions to night time in Goo Lagoon)
 * Sandy: SpongeBob, there you are. Megan's been expecting you. Come on.
 * SpongeBob: (walking up to Megan) Is that where you'll be doing the ball drop, Megan?
 * Megan: Yes. I call it my blue ball drop mattress. It's like something that seals sit on.
 * SpongeBob: Well, alright. Let's do this (he climbs up onto the mattress and hops onto Megan's back) *sigh in relief* Nice and cozy. Now let's do this!
 * Megan: Are you ready, SpongeBob?
 * SpongeBob: I'm ready for anything, Megan! Okay, let's do this. (puts the beach ball on Megan's nose) Steady, Megan. Steady............you got it! See, Sandy and Gary. We got our own ball.
 * Sandy: It 'll be great!
 * Gary: Meow! (Meaning "this is so embarrassing")
 * (transition - everyone gathered around Goo Lagoon for the ball drop)
 * Buttercup: The time is getting closer and closer, the seconds are ticking, excitement is building. The big moment is almost here! I'm so excited I could scream!
 * Sandy: Everyone, take your positions! The countdown is about to start!
 * SpongeBob: Okay, Megan. Make them proud!
 * Megan: You know I will!
 * Sandy: All right, y'all! Let's start the countdown! (blows whistle)
 * Crowd: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 0! (in slow motion, Megan throws back her head and groans and tosses the ball high up into the air, as caught by the eyes of SpongeBob, Sandy, Misty, Vicky, Kimi, Kim Possible, Frankie Foster, Buttercup, Dee Dee, Chris, Jill, Natalya, Crypto, Excella, Baron Proptop, Roger Rabbit, and Lee Lee. Then, the ball falls to the ground, and everyone cheers) Happy New Year!
 * SpongeBob: *does his cheering pose* WOOOOO!
 * Sandy: Yeehaaw! Happy New Year, SpongeBob! By the way, you have completed the week with no clothes on. In fact, (finds some underwear) Here, put these on. (SpongeBob does so)
 * SpongeBob: Thank Neptune. I was turning into a wild animal for a second there. (to Megan) Megan, you did it! You let the ball go! Heres a gold medal for you! Gary? (Gary gives Megan the medal)
 * Megan: Oh, thank you, thank you. (she kisses SpongeBob)
 * SpongeBob: Oh, boy. I think I'm falling for you! (he faints)
 * Megan: Literally (looks at him seductively).
 * (the next day)
 * SpongeBob: After all the excitement on the crowd that we caused. Let's say never to make another bet like that again.
 * Sandy: Oh, don't push you're luck SpongeBob. I had enough bets on nudity and bikinis for quite a while. In fact, I felt so proud for Megan, that I decided to become a tuxedo saleswoman. A squirrel who sells tuxedoes. If you want one, we can sell one to you. (she laughs)
 * (THE END)
 * (THE END)