South of the Border: Part 2

South of the Border: Part 2 is the eleventh episode of the first season of Better Days, and the 11th overall.

Plot
Eugene and Mark all go out looking for Adam, but end up running into Maja, who's conveniently filming her show in Mexico and can help them find Adam!

Transcript
Narrator: Last time on “Better Days”... Nobody cares, let’s just get on with the episode.

(Montage set to “Close to You” by The Avalanches, depicting Mr. Krabs and Mr. Shicowa desperately running after any lead they see that can help them find Adam. The first one of which is a tiny spider appears on Mr. Shicowa’s face, confusing him and sending him in a state of panic, until he starts holding Mr. Krabs close (to Krabs’ dismay) and eventually trembling so much that his lips disintegrate. Of course, this makes him even more worried and he screams, just in time for the spider to crawl into his mouth. Before it can be swallowed, a train hits Mr. Shicowa in the gut, forcing the spider out and smashing it onto a pole. Music pauses briefly for dialogue.)

Mr. Krabs: Hold it right there, Marky Mark!

(Mr. Shicowa does as asked and sticks the spider to the pole.)

Mr. Krabs: Feast your eyes on this! It’s yellow!

Mr. Shicowa: And?

Mr. Krabs: Adam YELLOWtail Fishman. This spider must know the way!

Mr. Shicowa: You’re a Goddamn genius. Let’s set it free so it can lead us to Adam!

Mr. Krabs: Be free, my bundle of fuzzy, yellow joy!

(Mr. Krabs scrapes the spider up from the pole and throws it so it can start walking. Unfortunately, the bus from earlier comes back from the other direction, hitting the spider while it is in the air. Krabs, angered by this, steps out onto the road and starts yelling, hoping the spider will come back.)

Mr. Krabs: Come on, little fella! Don’t give up on this now! Just because you got carelessly murdered by a drunken bus-driving bastard with no care for humanity or the environment, who would probably go to a shooting range just to blast all the beetles he finds, the sick son of a--

(The bus comes back again and hits Krabs, smashing his shell apart, leaving him as just pink flesh. Krabs sighs and the music begins again as we see Mr. Shicowa - with Krabs wrapped around him like a scarf - standing on top of the bus, which is moving rapidly, with Mr. Richards, Eustace, Walter and Dave. The music pauses briefly.)

Dave: I haven’t been on this level of thrill-seeking since I was a CSI investigator. You know, one time--

(Eustace throws Dave under the bus, quite literally, in order to stop him from telling an inevitably snooze-worthy story. The music returns as the bus driver falls asleep at the wheel, making the bus start to move chaotically. Mr. Shicowa sees the driver and quickly remembers the time where he fell asleep in a plane’s cockpit. As he daydreams, he remembers the consequences of that event and, terrified, leaps off of the bus, using his Krabs-scarf as a method of air travel, as he flies clumsily into a tree, which boomerangs him into several other trees.)

Mr. Richards: This happens way too often.

(Eventually, the trees send Mr. Shicowa crashing into the bus windows, which he smashes, leaving him and Krabs in the bus near all of the residents who are petrified due to the incoming crash. They all initially scream until they notice that the window they destroyed is now available for them to jump out of.)

Mexican Fish: Thank the Lord!

(A bunch of fish attempt to escape at the same time, but fail, so they try to take it one fish at a time, until Mr. Richards, Walter and Eustace also jump into the bus through the same window, kicking the fish back in.)

Walter: This music is rather unfitting for a disaster scene, I say--

(Before Walter can suggest a better piece of music, the bus flips over due to a bump in the road, combusts, leaving Dave’s flattened body aimlessly floating in the air. The music stops. We cut to a church in Mexico, where a female Priestfish is preaching about God.)

Priestfish: You want me to give a testimony about my life, and how good he’s been to me? I don’t know what to tell you about him. I love him so much with my heart and my soul and with every bone in my body, I love him so much, because he’s done so much for me. Every morning, every day of my life, I won’t always be crying these tea--

(The bus crashes into the church and onto the Priestfish, sending the building up in smokes. Mr. Shicowa is the first fish to drop out of the bus.)

Mr. Shicowa: Is this what happened to Walter when he overdosed?

(A male Priestfish hears about the overdose and prays for Walter. Cut to a hospital where we see a yellow fish filming an episode of her show about the poor children of underwater Mexico and the struggles they have to cope with, as healthcare is not affordable in the area. This is Maja Avery.)

Maja Avery: Every month, 2,000 fish, 80% of which are children, are sent into hospital for rest but never get the suitable treatment. In fact, just right now, 130 fish have entered the hospital after a bus crashed in a church, leaving the poorer of these fish with no money to get help a death sentence. We shall now interview one of these fish for a detailed look into what’s happening.

(Maja walks to a dazed Mr. Shicowa, giving him the microphone for an interview.)

Maja: Hello, what’s your name?

Mr. Shicowa: Mark Shicowa, what’s it to ya?

Maja: Ah, I see. So, Mr. Wassitooya, how did you end up here?

Mr. Shicowa: Well, I’m an elderly tourist who ended up in a bus crash with my friends and the visitors of a church whilst looking for my friend.

Maja: Who was your friend?

Mr. Shicowa: Adam Fishman.

Maja: Oh, my editor?

(Mr. Shicowa’s eyes boil and he lunges towards Maja, but before he can make a move, the episode ends. The credits are voiced over by the female Priestfish from earlier.)

Priestfish: No matter what you’ve been through or where you’ve been, he’s always there, with his arms open wide, accepting me for who I am, and I love him so much. I couldn’t do it without him, I wouldn’t want to. Oh, I’m crying now! It feels so good to be free, to be accepted for who you are and loved no matter what. Oh, Lord, thank you. You are the joy of my life.

Appearances

 * Eugene Krabs
 * Mark Shicowa
 * Mr. Richards
 * Eustace Wendell
 * Walter Ben
 * Dave Finnigan
 * Maja Avery (debut)
 * Priestfish (debut)
 * Mexican Male (debut)

Trivia

 * This is the first 2-parter.
 * This episode was based off of "Way Down Mexico Way" from Beavis & Butt-Head.
 * The testimony that the female Priestfish performs are lyrics from "So Alive", a house song by Kings of Tomorrow.
 * The number of episode this is, is 11, and this is part 2, 2 is II in roman numerals, II and 11 look very alike and it's a huge coincidence!
 * The ratings for the original airing of this episode were 8.03 million viewers.