Garold!

Garold! is the third episode of Dunces and Dragons.

Transcript

 * Narrator: Previously on Dunces and Dragons, King Bubble Bass the 8th found out Planktonamor’s castle was up for grabs and ended up claiming it. But Bikini Bottomshire also wanted the castle. So they settled it in a joust, however, during this joust Sir SpongeBob was stabbed with a lance and fell of his horse.
 * [Scene: Sir SpongeBob is just waking up in the castle]
 * Sir Patrick: He’s waking up.
 * Sir SpongeBob: Patrick, King Krabs, Squidly, some doctor. Uh… What happened?
 * King Krabs: You got stabbed during the joust. You have been unconscious for a few days.
 * Doctor: You weren’t seriously injured but we don’t recommend doing any jousts for a few weeks.
 * King Krabs: Yeah, because of that incident we won’t hold anymore jousts until you’re ready.
 * Sir SpongeBob: Wow, thanks King Krabs.
 * King Krabs: No problem, Sir SpongeBob.
 * Squidly: Would you like a limerick to cheer you up, Sir SpongeBob?
 * Sir SpongeBob: Sure, why not?
 * Squidly: ♪There once was a knight who protected the citizens from an enemy village. And, uhm, he lost a joust and was.♪ Oh.
 * Sir SpongeBob: That didn’t help at all. [starts crying] I have disappointed all of you. I think I should really be alone, right now.
 * King Krabs: You heard the boy, everybody out! [everyone leaves]
 * Sir SpongeBob: [sighs, twenty one pilots’ Stressed Out plays as a montage of scenes from the original series plays]
 * [Scene: Outside of Sir SpongeBob’s room]
 * King Krabs: We've got to do something to make him cheer up. Sir Patrick, you've obviously known Sir SpongeBob longer than us, what always made him happy?
 * Sir Patrick: Hmm… He always liked work, no wait, he can't do his job here now. Hmm… Why not we just go to the village and see if we can find anything.
 * King Krabs: Sounds like a plan, Squidly you come with us. Dark Knight! [Dark Knights appears] You guard the door while we go to the village, got it?
 * Dark Knight: Yes, sir!
 * King Krabs: Excellent!
 * [Scene: King Krabs, Sir Patrick, and Squidly are walking round the village]
 * King Krabs: See anything Sir SpongeBob likes?
 * Sir Patrick: Not really. But you know what Sir SpongeBob used to have?
 * King Krabs: What?
 * Sir Patrick: He used to have a snail.
 * King Krabs: Well, why didn't you just say so? The pet store is right over here. [enters the pet store] Good morning, pet store owner whose name I always forget.
 * Pet Store Owner: Good morning, King Krabs whose name I never forget. Mainly because you're king. What can I help you with?
 * King Krabs: I need a snail for my best knight, Sir SpongeBob!
 * Pet Store Owner: [gets out a snail that looks exactly like Gary] This is all I've got!
 * Sir Patrick: Wow, that looks exactly like the snail Sir SpongeBob used to have! Wait, what does exactly mean? [everyone starts laughing] But seriously what does exactly mean?
 * [Scene: Sir SpongeBob’s room]
 * King Krabs: Sir SpongeBob, I've got a surprise for you! [opens up the cage containing the snail]
 * Sir SpongeBob: Wow! You got me a snail! I'll call you Garold!
 * Garold: Meow.
 * Sir SpongeBob: Oh, he's perfect! [puts a lead on Garold] Let's take you out for a walk.
 * [Scene: Sir SpongeBob, Squidly, Sir Patrick, and King Krabs are out walking Garold in the village]
 * Sir SpongeBob: It sure is peaceful today.
 * King Krabs: I know right, wait a minute. [notices people from Ye Olde Kelp City are invading the village] Sir SpongeBob, you better take Garold home.
 * Sir SpongeBob: Why, I like it out here. Oh… [takes Garold home as fast as he can]
 * King Krabs: [walks up to the invaders] What do you think you're doing here?
 * King Bubble Bass the 8th: It is an old family tradition. When the King gets the castle back, we invade their village. Also, I had to teach my new assistant to read and write.
 * King Krabs: Oh. Wait, what does teaching your new assistant have to do with this?
 * King Bubble Bass the 8th: There is a school right over there.
 * King Bubble Bass’ Assistant: Sir, I've just learnt the alphabet!
 * King Bubble Bass the 8th: Good job!
 * King Krabs: Didn't you used to have a different assistant?
 * King Bubble Bass the 8th: Yeah, but he wouldn't do stuff my way, so I killed him.
 * King Krabs: And?
 * King Bubble Bass the 8th: And six others.
 * King Krabs: There you go.
 * King Bubble Bass’ Assistant: Wait, when I was in school I looked out the window and saw Sir SpongeBob looking rather happy.
 * King Bubble Bass the 8th: You weren't doing your work?! [shouting] Guards! [the guards take the assistant away] So what was Sir SpongeBob so happy about anyway?
 * Sir Patrick: Oh. He was really depressed after he lost the joust, so we got him a snail!
 * King Krabs: Patrick!
 * Sir Patrick: Sir Patrick is here!
 * King Krabs: Hah, don't listen to him. He is just crazy, Sir Patrick is crazy.
 * Sir Patrick: Sir Patrick is telling the truth!
 * King Krabs: Will you just shut up?
 * King Bubble Bass the 8th: Knights, invade the castle and kill that snail!
 * King Krabs: You wouldn't dare! [stabs King Bubble Bass with his sword]
 * King Bubble Bass the 8th: Ow! Son of a!
 * [Scene: King Bubble Bass’ knights are invading the castle]
 * King Krabs: We gotta get there fast!
 * Squidly: Wait a minute, isn't the Dark Knight guarding the door?
 * King Krabs: Yeah, but if Sir SpongeBob was able to take her down, then so can a bunch of knights.
 * [Scene: Sir SpongeBob in his room with Garold]
 * Sir SpongeBob: We should be safe up here. [hears some knights] What is that? [looks out the windows and see the knights] Ah, we're being invaded!
 * [Scene: The knights make it to the door but the Dark Knight sees them]
 * Dark Knight: Halt! Who goes there? [the knights make it through her and enter Sir SpongeBob’s room but Sir SpongeBob is already in armor with a sword ready to fight]
 * Sir SpongeBob: Let's do this! [a knight gets their sword out, they fight and Sir SpongeBob wins]
 * Dark Knight: [enters the room] What are you here for anyway?
 * The Knights: The snail!
 * Sir SpongeBob: Wait, what?
 * A Knight: Yes! We were sent by King Bubble Bass, to kill your snail!
 * Sir SpongeBob: [knocks out the knight that just spoke] Anyone else? [everyone comes charging up to Sir SpongeBob]
 * [Scene: King Krabs, Squidly, and Sir Patrick come running up the stairs]
 * King Krabs: Why did I put in so many stairs!
 * Squidly: That's what I ask you so many times!
 * King Krabs: Well, we're here now. [opens up the door to Sir SpongeBob’s room and sees a bunch of knights on the floor] What in the world?
 * Garold: Meow!
 * King Krabs: Who did this?
 * Sir SpongeBob: I did!
 * King Krabs: How?
 * Sir SpongeBob: I don't know, I just did! Well, we win I guess! [King Bubble Bass is crawling up the stairs]
 * King Bubble Bass the 8th: Why are there so many stairs? [Sir SpongeBob shows up] Uh oh! [runs out of the castle]
 * [Scene: Sir SpongeBob’s room]
 * King Krabs: Good job today Sir SpongeBob! You saved the castle, and your snail!
 * Sir SpongeBob: Oh thanks! Wait, where's the Dark Knight?
 * [Scene: The Dark Knight is defeating a bunch of knights]
 * Dark Knight: Anyone else? [notices that it is Bikini Bottomshire’s knights] Oh no! [episode ends]