Field Trip

Transcript
(Scene cuts to Shubie and Nancy walking in to Bikini Bottom Elementary)

Shubie: "Ugh, I hate parent-teacher conferences. They're always so boring."

Nancy: "Tell me about it." Shubie and Nancy walk into Mabel's classroom.

Mabel: "Welcome to parent-teacher conferences. Please have a seat at one of the desks until the other parents arrive. We're trying a new thing this year where the teachers just talk to all the parents at once instead of each one individually." Nancy and Shubie sit down at two of the desks. Evelyn walks into the room and sits down at a desk towards the back.

Mabel: "Ok that's everyone. Let's begin."

Shubie: "Is this really all the parents of the kids in this class?"

Mabel: "Well I'm also the mother of three of the nine kids in this class so yes."

Shubie: "There's only nine kids in this class?! Wow I never realized how small this town really is."

Mabel: "Are you done blabbering now? Yes it's a really small class, moving on. Most of your children are doing really well in this class. My Billy has an A+, Isabel has an A, Monroe and Tommy both have a B+, Susie has a B, Evelyn's Billy has a B-, Tyler has a C+, Shelly has a D+, and Taylor has a D."

Nancy: "Isabel's not at the top of her class? Oh no that could ruin her chances of going to Whale!" Mabel rolls her eyes.

Mabel: "Oh that must be so heartbreaking for you. Well at least my son Billy will be getting into Stanfjord. Anyway we are having a field trip tomorrow to the local museum and we need at least two parents to volunteer as chaperones."

Shubie: "Why do you need people to help you watch nine kids?"

Nancy: "I'll do it! Come on Shubie you should sign up too it would be a great way help our children since they're struggling in school right now."

Shubie: "They're not struggling, Isabel has an A and Susie has a B. Those are fine grades."

Nancy: "But she should have an A+ and come on Shubie, you and I both know that a B is not a good grade. If Isabel ever got a B in school then I wouldn't let her play with her friends for a month."

Shubie: "Why doesn't Evelyn do it? She doesn't even have a job and her son is doing worse than both of our kids!"

Evelyn: "That's no way to talk to your sister, I try very hard! And I already signed up for my daily appointment at the spa so I can't do it."

Mabel: "I still need one more person or the kids can't go."

Nancy: "Come on Shubie, think of all the great things our children will learn if they go to this." Shubie sighs.

Shubie: "Fine I'll do it."

Mabel: "Excellent. You both need to be here by 9 tomorrow."

(Scene cuts to Shubie driving Susie to school the next day)

Shubie: "So are you excited about your field trip to the museum today?"

Susie: "Not really. Museums are boring." Shubie stops at a red light.

Shubie: "Oh don't be such a Debbie downer." Debbie drives up next to them.

Debbie: "Hey!"

Shubie: "Sorry. I'm sure you'll have a lot of fun Susie. I can't wait to go and see all the cool things they have there."

Susie: "Wait, you're coming as a chaperone?"

Shubie: "Yes your teacher said that she needed two chaperones to help her so I said that I could help." Shubie pulls into the school parking lot and her and Susie walk into the bus in front of the school.

Nancy: "Come sit back here Shubie, I mean, Mrs. Peterson!" Shubie sits in the back of the bus next to Nancy. Mabel walks onto the bus.

Mabel: "Is everyone here? Ok driver, start the bus! Today we will be going on a field trip to the museum class. Make sure you thank Mrs. Peterson and Mrs. Fishbowl for coming along with us as chaperones!" The kids give Shubie and Nancy a round of applause.

Nancy: "Oh I'm so excited for this field trip! I can't wait to teach Isabel all about Bikini Bottom's history so she can ace that entrance exam at Whale! But don't worry it'll be helpful for Susie too when she goes to Bikini Bottom Community College."

Shubie: "Yeah you know there are a lot of other schools Susie can go to though. It isn't like her only options are community college and Whale."

Nancy: "Yeah but let's face it almost all of these kids will go to community college like almost everyone did back when we were kids. You were just lucky enough to be really good at softball so you didn't have to go to community college like me and Frank and Nat and almost everyone else in high school." The bus stops.

Driver: "We're here!"

Shubie: "What?! We've only been on the bus for two minutes! I could've just driven here instead of going to the school and taking the bus." All the kids get off the bus, followed by Nancy, Shubie and Mabel.

Mabel: "Ok I'll take the A group: Small Billy, Monroe and Tommy. Nancy will have the B group: Isabel, Tall Billy and Tyler. And finally Shubie will take the C group: Susie, Shelly and Taylor. Now let's all take our groups and split up, we'll meet back here at 2. Oh, and here are the scavenger hunts the museum gave us. Whoever finds all 20 items will win uh..." Mabel looks in her purse.

Mabel: "The four lollipops in my purse!"

Nancy: "Competitive thinking is a huge part of Whale's admission test! This scavenger hunt will be perfect for Isabel!"

Shubie: "Why are we taking these kids on a scavenger hunt? Wouldn't it be much better if we actually taught them history?"

Mabel: "You have a lot to learn Shubie. Kids will get bored visiting a museum all day. This scavenger hunt will keep them entertained and make it less likely that they'll act up." Shubie takes a scavenger hunt from Mabel and walks away.

Shubie: "Susie, Taylor and Shelly! You guys are with me!"

Shelly: "Ugh, why do I always get the boring mom?" Shubie, Susie, Taylor and Shelly walk into the museum.

Shubie: "So what would you like to see first? We could go to the medieval exhibit, or the Viking exhibit or the Old West exhibit."

Shelly: "Or we could just go to the arcade."

Shubie: "Why would a museum have an arcade? A museum should be a place that teaches history not a place to hang out and defeat bad guys. Let's go somewhere else so we can actually learn something like we're supposed to be today."

Taylor: "Let's go to the Caveman exhibit!"

Shubie: "Really? Out of all the time period based exhibits you want to go to the one that has nothing from the scavenger hunt and where fish sat around all day and rubbed sticks together?" Taylor nods his head and Shubie takes the group to the Caveman exhibit.

Shubie: "Look kids it's when fishkind first discovered how to create fire!" Shelly walks over to another part of the exhibit that has the skeleton of a huge prehistoric fish.

Shelly: "Woah. Hey Susie come climb this with me!"

Susie: "Uh I don't think we're supposed to climb that."

Shelly: "Oh come on, don't be such a wimp." Shelly starts climbing the skeleton.

Shubie: "Hey look at this cave painting! Guys? Guys? Where did they go?" Shubie turns around and sees Shelly climbing up the skeleton.

Shubie: "Oh no! Shelly get down from there this instant you're not allowed to climb up there!" Shelly climbs down from the skeleton.

Shubie: "Don't ever do that again or else we'll get kicked out of this place."

Shelly: "But the guard is asleep over there!"

Shubie: "I don't care. We are not ruining this museum." Shelly sighs.

Shelly: "Fine." Shubie takes her group out of the caveman exhibit and into the Viking exhibit.

Shubie: "Wow check out those huge ships the Vikings made! That's one item found on the scavenger hunt! I can't believe these things used to be able to hold one hundred warriors!" Shubie checks to Viking ship off the scavenger and Taylor walks over to another part of the exhibit that has a Viking helmet.

Taylor: "That looks so cool." Taylor grabs the helmet and puts it on his head.

Shubie: "Hey come look at this. This is the flaming shield contests that Vikings used to play all the time. Isn't that cool?" Shubie looks down and the kids and sees Taylor wearing the Viking helmet.

Shubie: "Taylor! Take that helmet off this instance and put it back! We're not allowed to touch stuff that belongs to the museum! Come on let's go to the medieval exhibit before anyone notices that you were wearing a priceless artifact." Shubie takes her group to the medieval exhibit.

Shubie: "Hey look Taylor this fish looks just like you! And that one looks like Mrs. Rechid! Taylor?" Shubie looks down and doesn't see Taylor.

Shubie: "Oh no where did he go now?" Shubie looks around and sees Taylor trying to lift up a sword. Shubie runs towards him.

Shubie: "Taylor put that down!" Shubie grabs the sword from Taylor and puts it back.

Shelly: "Hey what does this do?" Shubie turns around and sees Shelly playing with a medieval execution devices.

Shubie: "Shelly!" Shubie runs over to Shelly and grabs her before a blade chops off her head.

Taylor: "Hey look it's a catapult!" Shubie turns around and sees Taylor climbing into the catapult.

Shubie: "Taylor no!" Shubie runs over to the catapult, grabs Taylor and gets him out of the catapult before it launches.

Shubie: "These things are not toys!" Shelly walks over to a suit of armor.

Shelly: "I wanna try it on!" Shelly tries to climb into the knight armor but Shubie grabs her.

Shubie: "That's it! You two have been nothing but trouble the whole day! Stop this right now or I'll put you back on the bus for the rest of the day! Do you understand? I'm not letting you ruin the museum!"

Shelly: "Ok, ok, we get it. Jeez you don't have to yell so much." Shubie let's go of Shelly and Taylor, and looks at her watch.

Shubie: "Well it's almost 12 now. Let's go get some lunch at the food court. Hopefully you guys will be better behaved after that."

(Scene cuts to Shubie, Susie, Shelly and Taylor ordering food at the food court) Taylor walks over to the burger stand

Cashier: "Would you like a burger?"

Taylor: "Do it come in raspberry?"

Cashier: "Uh, no."

Taylor: "Blueberry?"

Cashier: "Nope it doesn't come in blueberry either."

Taylor: "Raspberry?" The cashier sighs. Nancy and her group walk into the food court.

Nancy: "Hurry up a get some food kids! We only have one item left on the scavenger hunt!" Nancy sits down next to Shubie.

Nancy: "So how's your group been doing with the scavenger hunt? Mine's already found 19! We just have this one coin looking thing left."

Shubie: "Uh well... my group has found one item so far."

Nancy: "One?! Oh Shubie, this is exactly why your daughter's going to community college while mine's going to Whale."

Shubie: "What has been up with you today? Why do you keep talking so much about Whale? Our daughters aren't even in middle school yet let alone high school! Don't you think that you're focusing on this a little too early?"

Nancy: "Oh Shubie, you have a lot to learn. If you want your children to get into a good school and have a bright future, you need to groom them for it at a young age. It's not like they're just going to wake up one day and want to do that themselves especially with kids like Susie holding them back."

Shubie: "Kids like Susie?! You don't think that my daughter has what it takes to become successful? Well I'll show you! My group's gonna win that scavenger hunt and prove to you than anyone can become successful regardless of what snooty college they went to!" Nancy laughs.

Nancy: "You're group is going to find 19 items before my group finds one? Good luck with that!" Nancy laughs and walks away.

(Scene cuts to Shubie, Susie, Taylor and Shelly walking around the museum) Shubie looks at her watch.

Shubie: "We still have an hour and thirty minutes left. That's more than enough time to find all the items on the scavenger hunt."

Shelly: "Can't you just cross off all the items without us actually looking for any of them?"

Shubie: "No Shelly, that would be cheating. I'm not a cheater. Don't you want those lollipops your teacher said she'd give us if we win?"

Shelly(sighs): "I guess so."

Shubie: "Good. Now let's try to find those items!" Shubie and her group walk into the revolution exhibit.

Taylor: "Hey there's the cannon!"

Susie: "And that's the flag!"

Shelly: "Aren't those the pointy gun thingies?"

Shubie: "You mean the bayonets? Very good group! We've already found three items! Only sixteen more to go!"

(Scene cuts to a montage of Shubie, Susie, Taylor and Shelly finding a bunch of the items on the scavenger hunt)

Susie: "That's the cowboy hat!"

Shubie: "Excellent! We only have one item left to find and it's that weird coin looking thing! Now where could it be?"

Taylor: "Maybe it's in the arcade."

Shubie: "That's silly. Why would they put something from the arcade in here? It has to be in one of the exhibits." Shubie and her group walks around the corner and into the medieval exhibit. Nancy and her group walks past them.

Nancy: "Out of the way Shubie! My group has a scavenger hunt to win!"

Shubie: "Well so does mine!"

Nancy: "Oh are you on your third item now?"

Shubie: "Nope. I'm on the twentieth."

Nancy: "Well it doesn't matter. My group will still find the last item first and win!"

Shubie: "I wouldn't be so sure of it." Nancy and her group walks away.

Shubie: "Come on guys we have to win this! Where's the one place we haven't looked yet?"

Shelly: "The arcade!"

Shubie: "You really think it's in the arcade? But what would an arcade have that would look like this?"

Shelly: "Oh I don't know maybe a token!"

Shubie: "A token?" Shubie looks at the photo more closely and sees the word token on the coin.

Shubie: "It is a token!" Shubie looks at her watch.

Shubie: "Oh no we only have five minutes before we have to go! Let's get to the arcade as fast as we can!" Shubie and her group sprints towards the arcade.

Shubie: "We're here!" Shubie sees Billy, Monroe and Tommy playing the arcade while Mabel is sleeping in a chair. Shubie walks over to Mabel.

Shubie: "Your group has been in the arcade this whole time?!" Mabel wakes up.

Mabel: "What are you doing here?! And I figured I might as well take a day off and let my kids have fun while the other mothers actually taught their kids something. You don't know how stressful it is being a teacher."

Shubie: "I had to miss work today and take these kids on a tour around the museum because you wanted a day off?! If your job is so stressful then get a new one! And we're here we finished the scavenger hunt so we want our prizes now!"

Mabel: "Oh yeah that thing." Mabel hands them the lollipops.

Mabel: "Here you go. Now let's get back on the bus and go home."

(Scene cuts to Shubie sitting next to Nancy with a lollipop in her mouth on the way back to the school)

Nancy: "Wow Shubie you and Susie actually beat me and Isabel in that scavenger hunt today. Maybe your daughter does have a chance at getting into Whale after all."

Shubie: "Thanks but that wasn't really my point. My point was that any of these kids can accomplish their goals as long as they're determined and try hard." Nancy laughs.

Nancy: "You're funny Shubie! As if any of these blockheads have a chance at getting into Whale like our daughters do!" Shubie sighs.

(Scene ends)