DoodleBob DrawnPants/Transcript

(Episode begins with an overhead shot of Sandy's treedome. A machine can be seen inside. SpongeBob is walking towards the door. SpongeBob knocks on the door)

SpongeBob: Sandy!

Sandy: (Over intercom) Hey SpongeBob! Come on in!

(SpongeBob opens the door and steps in. He puts on a helmet as the water drains out. He enters the treedome to see Sandy working on a machine)

SpongeBob: Hey Sandy! What's that?

Sandy: I call it the "Thing-a-ma-jigger-whatchamacallit-o-matic." It's supposed to reproduce objects!

(Close up of the machine with rays of sunshine glorifying it. Unenthusiastic "ta-da" sound effect plays)

SpongeBob: Cool! Can I try it?

Sandy: No way, the Thing-a-ma-jigger-whatchamacallit-o-matic is still a prototype. I need to fix a few bugs.

(An oven ding can be heard)

Sandy: That's the tea I prepared before you came! One minute!

(Sandy runs inside her tree. SpongeBob curiously observes the Thing-a-ma-jigger-whatchamacallit-o-matic. He presses a few buttons. A chamber opens, and he is sucked into it, the chamber acting like a vacuum. SpongeBob screams)

SpongeBob: Help!

(He comes out the end with a clone. It looks like a poorly drawn doodle. It is holding a giant pencil)

SpongeBob: Woah! It worked...! Sorta...

DoodleBob: (Unintelligible language)

SpongeBob: Well, you look like a doodle... so I'll call you... DoodleBob DrawnPants!

DoodleBob: (Sounds of agreements)

(Sandy comes back holding tea)

Sandy: Holy fishpaste!

(She drops the tea)

Sandy: That thing's uglier than a jackrabbit without beauty sleep on a diet!

DoodleBob: (Sounds of anger)

SpongeBob: Hey, Sandy! Meet my clone, DoodleBob DrawnPants!

Sandy: I thought I told you not to touch my machine...

SpongeBob: Well... at least you know it worked!

Sandy: Yeah, but... all it did was create a bad doodle version.

DoodleBob: (Sounds of rage)

(DoodleBob sprints for the Treedome exit. He knocks over Sandy in the process)

SpongeBob: Bad doodle!

(DoodleBob breaks out, flooding the treedome. Sandy grabs her helmet at the last minute)

Sandy: That thing's loose in Bikini Bottom!

SpongeBob: We've gotta warn everybody!

(Bubble transition to the Krusty Krab)

Sandals: Can I have a Krabby Patty with extra onions?

Squidward: (Sarcastically) daring today, aren't we? That'll be $1.50.

(SpongeBob and Sandy burst in)

SpongeBob: There's an angry doodle about to ravage the city!

(Nobody reacts. There's an awkward silence)

SpongeBob: Our city!

(Pandemonium instantly ensues. Food flies everywhere, furniture is toppled. SpongeBob and Sandy make their way to the register)

Squidward: SpongeBob, what were you thinking?! With the new renovations L.I.V.E. has made, the Krusty Krab will be safe!

Sandy: I agree. SpongeBob, you may be overreacting a bit-

SpongeBob: You haven't seen him! He's a vicious, deranged, cold-blooded predator!

Sandy: SpongeBob, it's just one doodle. I can easily wrangle 'im up.

Harold: Look outside!

(Outside, there is a crowd surrounding a building. DoodleBob is standing on top of it, making a speech in some doodle language)

Tom: What's he doing?

Squidward: Look!

(DoodleBob begins drawing some copies of himself, slowly creating a doodle army. They begin jumping down)

SpongeBob: Run for your lives!

(Mr. Krabs walks outside)

Mr. Krabs: What in the name Neptune are ye doin,' scarin' away me customers!

SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs, it's terrible! A doodle army is about to devour the entire city!

Mr. Krabs: Devour, you say? That gives me an idee-er...

Squidward: Ohhh boy.

(Mr. Krab sets up a stand. A sign reads "All Doodles Welcome!")

Mr. Krabs: All doodles welcome! Krabby Patties, only a dollar! Get yer free-

(A couple of Doodle Soldiers run over and destroy the stand and run away with all the Krabby Patties)

Mr. Krabs: Sweet mother'a Pearl! (Angry) You have to pay for that, ye swindlin' bilge rats!

Sandy: Come on, guys! This is no time to mess around! We gotta stop DoodleBob!

Squidward: Oh, you gave it a name. How cute.

SpongeBob: I know, right? I came up with it myself.

Squidward: Right.

Patrick: Hey, guys.

SpongeBob: Oh, hey, Patrick

Patrick: I was taking a stroll today and I couldn't help but notice; Bikini Bottom looks slightly different today, but I just can't put my finger on it.

Mr. Krabs: What was it? The fact that Bikini Bottom is in complete chaos?

Sandy: Stop foolin' around! We gotta find DoodleBob's lair!

Squidward: How do you know it has a lair?

SpongeBob: That's easy, Squidward. Everyone knows to be a supervillain mastermind you need to have an evil lair.

Mr. Krabs: Well, how do we know where to find this "lair?"

Sandy: Hmm...

(Sandy notices Doodle Soldiers all carrying things in one direction)

Sandy: I think that those Doodle Soldiers are taking their spoils to DoodleBob's headquarters!

Squidward: Oh, so it's DoodleBob HQ now? Might as well start a company called "Doodle Inc."

SpongeBob: Didn't some Soldiers take a few Krabby Patties? Patrick-

(Patrick is snoring. He wakes up when SpongeBob says his name)

Patrick: Present!

SpongeBob: Can't you sniff out those patties?

Patrick: Yeah, sure.

Mr. Krabs: That's a great idea, me boy!

Squidward: But can't we just follow the-

Sandy: Shut up, Squidward! Patrick needs to concentrate.

(Squidward rolls his eyes)

Patrick: I got it!

(Patrick starts walking to his destination)

Squidward: Well, I'm going home.

Mr. Krabs: Oh no, ye aren't! Yer helpin' us.

Squidward: But why do I have to go?

Mr. Krabs: Deadpan humor purposes.

Squidward: What now?

SpongeBob: Follow that starfish!

(Episode fades out for commercial break. We come back to find the five hiding behind a rock to view the Doodle Castle. Some time has passed and it is now nighttime. A single file line of Doodle Soldiers are entering the castle)

SpongeBob: What now? We'll never get past those defenses!

Patrick: I've mapped out a plan for us to make it in; There's a weak point in the wall that we can climb up on. I can silently take out any guards we've come across. We then need to climb in through a window at the back of the throne room. Mr. Krabs and Patrick can take out the bodyguards while I take down DoodleBob. Meanwhile, SpongeBob and Squidward will be finding away to open the castle gates automatically to let the Bikini Bottom Army in, of whom I planned to arrive.

(Everybody is staring in awe at Patrick. A time card pops up)

French Narrator: One and a half seconds later...

SpongeBob: That plan is brilliant! Patrick, your genius is showing!

Patrick: What? I was just reading from a candy bar wrapper. Wait, my genius is showing?!

(Patrick covers the areas where his genitals would be located)

Squidward: And so the idiot becomes stupid once more.

Sandy: That wasn't a candy bar wrapper, that was my plan!

Mr. Krabs: Well, that was expected. Besides, did nobody notice how he referred to himself in the third person?

Squidward: I did.

Sandy: Anyway... yes, that is my plan.

Squidward: There is no way I'm going with-

(Squidward points at SpongeBob)

Squidward: "-yuck" to open the gates.

Sandy: Do you wanna fight some Doodle Bodyguards?

Squidward: I'm in!

SpongeBob: Yeah, me too!

Mr. Krabs: I'm only in it for the money.

Patrick: Yeah, for the money. What's money again?

(Squidward facepalms)

Sandy: Well, I guess it's confirmed. We're team Anti-Doodle. Also, I made some eraser-guns to fight the doodles.

(Sandy hands out eraser-guns)

SpongeBob: Let's go, team!

(Bubble transition to behind the Doodle Castle)

Sandy: Alright, we'll need to make a run for it so we don't get spotted by any of the watchtower guards. 3, 2...

(Patrick starts running for the unguarded wall mentioned in the plan. Sandy sighs)

Sandy: Run!

(SpongeBob, Sandy, Squidward and Mr. Krabs sprint for the wall, following close behind Patrick. Patrick crashes into the wall, shaking it slightly. A doodle guard mumbles something to the watchtower guard)

SpongeBob: Look! a convenient rock we can hide behind!

(Sandy pushes them behind the rock at the last second. The watchtower spotlight shines over them, but they are hidden. The watchtower guard shrugs and turns the spotlight away)

Patrick: It's funny... this morning, I started out by a rock, and now I'm by a rock again! It's like a pun or something.

SpongeBob: Hey, that is funny!

(He almost starts to laugh but Mr. Krabs places a claw over his mouth)

Sandy: We need to be quiet!

(She takes a grappling hook out of her bag, only to find the hook is bitten into. Patrick is chewing something)

Patrick: This candy bar sure tastes funny... like... hook-flavored!

SpongeBob: Patrick! We needed that!

Sandy: Darnit!

Mr. Krabs: What now?

(Sandy, Mr. Krabs, and SpongeBob suddenly stop and stare at Squidward)

Squidward: Wait, why's everybody looking at me funny...?

(Camera switches to the top of the wall. Squidward is seen thrown up like a grappling hook, his head loding on the wall)

Squidward: Ow...!

Sandy: Quiet, Squidward...!

(Each Ant-Doodle member begins climbing the rope, eventually stepping on Squidward, to which he moans in pain)

Squidward: I never agreed to this...!

SpongeBob: It's called improvisation, Squidward.

Patrick: Yeah, and pain!

Mr. Krabs: Well, look on the bright side! It's free pain.

(Sandy picks up Squidward and throws him at the windowsill across the castle grounds. His head hits the window with a loud thud)

Sandy: Hurry!

(The team rushes over the rope as a few guards are walking over to check it it. Sandy makes it over just in time. Sandy unties Squidward. They now all stand in front of the window, and are staring down at the throne room)

Sandy: Alright. Patrick, Mr. Krabs, you go for those bodyguards. SpongeBob, Squidward, it looks like there's a tunnel. That might lead to some sorta control room. Any questions?

Squidward: Well, I was wondering-

Patrick: How am I supposed to beat up some doodles?

SpongeBob: I know! Pretend they called you tubby.

Patrick: They called me tubby? Grr...

Sandy: Okay, anymore?

Squidward: Um-

Mr. Krabs: Where do I get the money? I said before I'm in it for the money.

Patrick: Yeah, me too. Seriously, though, what's money...?

Sandy: Well, it looks like DoodleBob keeps his hoard of items here. Surely there's some loose change. So, anymore questions?

Squidward: Yes, uh-

Sandy: No? Okay, good.

(Squidward rolls his eyes. They open the window quietly, but Patrick angrily jumped out and raced for one of the bodyguards)

Patrick: For the money even though I don't know what money is!

(Sandy sighs and jumps down to face DoodleBob. Mr. Krabs helps Patrick, and Squidward and SpongeBob run for the corridor)

Sandy: Yer time is up, DoodleBob! Got any last words?

DoodleBob: (Unintelligible ranting)

Sandy: Say again?

DoodleBob: (Boredly repeats what he said slowly)

Sandy: Ohh... kay.

(Patrick punches a doodle bodyguard, knocking him out)

Mr. Krabs: Patrick! Ter defeat them, ye need ter use yer eraser-gun!

Patrick: (Attempting to use a tough voice) thanks for the exposition, Krabs, but I- (normal voice) oh wait! You're right!

(He holds up his gun and shoots a doodle, causing it to be erased. Mr. Krabs sighs and continues fighting. Meanwhile, SpongeBob and Squidward get to the control room. A doodle is standing there, but Squidward raises his gun and erases it)

SpongeBob: (Looks through a viewport showing the gate) Now, which button is it...

(He presses one. In the throne room, a doodle cage falls over Sandy)

SpongeBob: No... how about... this one!

(He presses another, causing a cage to fall over Patrick and Mr. Krabs)

Squidward: Move out of the way!

(Squidward presses a button, causing the gate to open. a squadron of Bikini Bottom Army soldiers run in and begin fighting the Doodle Soldiers)

Squidward: Good! Now, let's go back.

(Camera switches back to the throne room)

DoodleBob: (Evilly laughs, then says something similar to "nothing can stop me")

Sandy: What happened...?

Patrick: We were trapped by conveniently placed cages, like that rock back outside.

(Suddenly, the army bursts in. DoodleBob realizes he's done for, so he runs into a secret passage behind his throne before any soldier can get him. SpongeBob and Squidward come back down as Sandy, Patrick, and Mr. Krabs are being freed)

SpongeBob: Well, I guess it's all over.

Mr. Krabs: And now, I get the money!

(Mr. Krabs dives into the spoils)

Squidward: Time for a well-needed nap.

Patrick: Yeah, that.

(Soldiers are attempting to drag Mr. Krabs out of the spoils)

Patrick: Hey, you guys wanna go grab a pizza?

SpongeBob, Squidward and Sandy: Sure.

(They all walk away. A bubble transition cuts to DoodleBob dragging his feet along towards a sunrise. He collapses. Plankton's shadow over looms him, but Plankton is not seen)

Plankton: Perfect. Now, Operation: E.V.I.L. can finally begin.

(Episode ends)