Norbert and the Simpsons

Norbert and the Simpsons is the eighth episode of the first season of Discord Crib.

Plot
Bert Simpson decides to give the crib a piece of his mind and brings Marge. Meanwhile, a user named Norbert joins as well.

Transcript
[One lone day at #hubba-bubba, Dan and Bot are discussing some… er… stuff.]

[SB678] spongebot likes memes: I've seen some female straight ones before.

[Polar] GIRL: @[SB678] spongebot likes memes

[SB678]: oh shut up lmao

[Dan]: @[SB678] maybe you're a female straight one.

[SB678]: im a dead asexual (sad)

[Polar]: what are we talking about again?

[SB678]: how males are ped-

---> Bert Sampson has joined. Seems op plz nerf.

[Polar]: fuck

Bert Sampson : EAT PANT

[SB678]: no u

[Purple]: u

[Bart Simpson]: no w

[SB678]: bart you’re gay

Matchy: who’s dis fool

[SB678]: you

[Bart Simpson]: no i’m not

[Polar]: SPONGEBOT STOP IT

[Crazy]: hoopl-o shit

[SB678]: dude

[Bert]: shit wrong timing

[SB678]: it’s not me

[Matchy] lmao

[Crazy]: dudud

[SB678]: im trying to cum

[Polar]: srsly it’s not me

[Crazy]: it’s me jk

[Bart Simpson]: it’s jasbre jk

[Crazy]: it’s hoopla

jk

[SB678]: god dammit im late to my meeting

[Bert Simpson]: polar has a hoopla fetish

[Matchy]: big oof

[Crazy]: dudu

[Jasbre]: that isnt me

[Bert]: i gotta go MASTURBATE

[Jasbre]: dh fuck you impersonator

[Bert Simpson]: see you pant-eaters in a bit

[SB678]: its either travis or dan

[Bert Simpson]: diddly fuck you too jasbutt

→ bert sampson just joined.

[Crazy] og

[Jasbre] ok someone's an asshole

[Bert] how did i get here

[Crazy] not me

[Sb678] woah

[Jasbre] someone invited you

[Crazy] hoopla

[Lock] oh hi bart

[Matchy] triple oof

[Lock] how's uh…

[Seemsgood] eat my shorts

[Jasbre] lock cut the crap

[Lock] hows things

[Bert] hi locko im burt

[Jasbre] eat travis’ ass bart

[Lock] hi bart

[Bert] miss me with that gay shit

[Lock] why are you even here

[Jasbre] ok matchy

[Bert] bruh

[Lock] bruh

[Bert] brushki

[Lock] bruh?

[Bert] bish you don't know who i am

[Jasbre] lol if i ban you then i can find out

[Matchy] well then who are you xD

[Lock] did you just assume his gender

[Crazy] your hoopla simpson

[SB678] woahah

[Bert] ok now i really need to fap gtg

[Lock] bye?

[The crib thinks they're safe for now, but later…]

[Jasbre] ik matchy is bart cuz he sent only one message through this thing.

[Crazy] o

[SB678] o

-> welcome, Norbert. We hope you brought pizza.

[SB678] FUCK

[Purple133] WHAT EVEN IS THIS

[Matchy] i did more than one bruh

[Lock] AAAAAA WHY AM I SCREAMIIIIIINNNNNG

[Seemsgood] why the Fuck are people joining

[Norbert] hi guys, I'm Norbert.

[Matchy] ik it's you SG

[Lock] hi Norbert

[Dan] @Norbert I WANNA MAKE LOVE TO YOUR WO-

Fandom: slow down there, dirty dan, you can't say that

[Dan] since when was that a rule?

Fandom: it hasnt, we just don't like those jokes.

[Dan] shit

[Jasbre] Matchy made an invite a few mins ago it has 2 uses.

Norbert: @dan weird…

[Lock] im not norbert

Norbert: hi guys.

[Polar] hi

[SB678] this is weird

[Lock] Not me

[Dan] @norbert i was referencing chef from south park dumbass

Norbert: Norbert is Norbert.

[Lock] JEFFY IS GAWD

[Seemsgood] HOW THE FUCK AM I NORBERT

Norbert: i prefer sonic the headhig.

[CS] is norbert hoopla

[Seemsgood] I AM NOT NORBERT

[Dan] “headhig”

[Lock] im not him either

[Norbert] no, Norbert is Norbert.

[Matchy] norBERT

[Cs] o

[Polar] Im not Norbert

[Lock] meet Norbert, he's your neighbor.

[Jasbre] Polar is Norbert

[Lock] he watches you sleep.

[Matchy] operating 3 accounts would be voodoo

[polar] it’s not me!

[matchman] is it bot?

[bot] it’s not me

[norbert] norbert is norbert.

[polar] who is this?

[norbert] norbert.

[lock] norbert is my wife.

[CS] THIS IS PATRICK

[bot] @norbert you like sml?

[lock] aw norbert left

[bot] hi discord cribb readers

(LATER: AFTER MR. MACKEY JOINED AND THEN EVENTUALLY LEFT THE CRIB)

→ homer the simpson joined your party

[Homer] d’oh! [lock] why

[cs] also no

[Homer] gimme a donut.

[cs] ok

[Homer] and you live.

[cs] here (hands donut)

[Homer] stupid (red) flanders!

[cs] hey homer, do you know your son bert sampson?

[homer] my son is a (BLEEP) (BLEEP), I beat him everyday.

[homer] OH FUCK I AM NOT HUMMER

[Lock] why

[homer] @lock FUCK YOU

[cs] oh

[homer] BERT WHERE’S BERT

[CS] uh

[homer] WHERE’S BERT? I WANT VERY! *BERT, FUCK!

[cs] oh, alright then.

[homer] @CountSponge @Mildreeeeed @purple @pluto WHERE'S BERT

[lock] oof.

[cs] uh, ask matchy. He’ll know.

[homer] I NEED TO BEAT HIM

[cs] ok, more like

[pluto] holy crao

[cs] I NEED TO bert HIM

(badum tss)

[pluto] bert left.

[Homer] WHERE’S BERT

[purple] OH NO

[homer] THAT (bleep)

[pluto] his last words were, “eat my shorts”

[homer] FUCK DAMN, MY ANGER HAS REACHED MAXIMUM LEVEL

[dan/eric] humer eat {bleep}

[homer] @eric YOU FIRST ERIC FARTMAN

[Some bot on the server] homer has leveld up!

[homer] SHUT UPU

[lock] calm down homer

[eric] consume butt droppings

[Homer] MY SON IS BUTT DROPPINGS

(after a long sequence of slurs, butt and male private parts jokes and homer getting fired)

[Homer] ok im calm now.

[Homer] where am I? Im Gonna go now…

[Lock] oh god the pings

---> bert has joined

[Bert] im hiding from my dad, he (bleep)s me

[Lock] what?

[Bert] oh fuck here he comes

(Bert has left)

[Cs] oh.

[Luis] who wants to guest-write the next ep of discord crib?

[Lock and Seemsgood] me!

[Luis] alright.

[Norbert] hi, I'm norbert.

[Lock] shut up, Norbert.

[Dan] back to our conversation @spongebot.

[Bot] ok.

[Norbert] hi, im Norbert.

[Lock, Seemsgood, dan and bot] shut up, Norbert.

Le end